"Mailman's Final Day" joke
After 30 years of delivering mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood, it was the mailman's final day on the job.
When he arrived at the first house on his route, the family was all there to greet him. They all congratulated him, wished him well and sent him on his way with a gift envelope.
The family at the second house presented him with a selection of terrific fishing lure. At the third house, he was given a box of fine cigars.
At the fourth house he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. Taking him by the hand, she gently led him through the door and up the stairs to the bedroom where she presented him with the most passionate love he had ever experienced.
When he had had enough, they went downstairs to the kitchen where she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, bacon, potatoes, sausages, waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied, she poured him a cup of fresh roasted coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup.
"All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar for?"
"Well," she said, "last night I told my husband that today would be your final day on the job and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you. He said, 'Screw him, give him a dollar.' The breakfast was my idea."
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(Un deux trois quatre cinq)
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Three ministers - a Presbyterian, a Methodist, and a Baptist - and their wives were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship; they all drowned, and before long, they were standing before St. Peter.
First came the Presbyterian and his wife. St. Peter more...
2 Scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the scousers ask him for a lift.
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20, more...