Brunette Jokes / Recent Jokes

A blonde and a brunette are walking down the street and they pass a flower shop were the brunette happens to see her boyfriend buying flowers.
She sighs and says, "Oh crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again for no reason"
The blonde looks at her and says, "What's the big deal, don't you like getting flowers?"
The brunette says, "Oh sure...but I just don't feel like spending the next three days on my back with my legs in the air"
The blonde says, "Don't you have a vase?"

A blonde, brunette, and a red head were driving in a car and ran a stop sign. A police officer seen them and immediately started chasing them. The girls ran from the police and when they got a long wayz away from the police they saw 3 potato sacks on the side of the road. They all got out and each got in a potato sack. When the cops came and they seen the empty car and the three potato sacks, they went over and kicked each one. The first one they kicked was the brunette and she said ruff ruff. The cops thought it was a bag of puppies and went to the next bag. This was the red head and when they kicked this one she said meow. They thought it was just a bag of kittens and went to the next bag. This was the blonde and when they kicked the bag she said potato!!!

There was a competition to cross the English channel doing
only the breaststroke, and the three women who entered the race
were a brunette, a redhead and a blonde.
After approximately 14 hours, the brunette staggered up on the
shore and was declared the fastest swimmer. About 40 minutes
later, the redhead crawled up on the shore and was declared
the second place finisher.
Nearly 4 hours after that, the blonde finally came ashore and
promptly collapsed in front of the worried onlookers. When the
reporters asked why it took her so long to complete the race,
she replied, "I don't want to sound like I'm a sore loser, but
I think those two other girls were using their arms."

Q. What's the difference between butter and a blonde?
A. Butter is difficult to spread.
Q. What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you?
A. Pull the pin and throw it back.
Q. What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette?
A. Artificial intelligence.
Q. What do you call a blonde standing on her head?
A. A brunette with bad breath.
Q. What do blondes and cow shit have in common?
A. The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
Q. How does a blond turn on the light after sex?
A. She opens the car door.
Q. What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A. When you smack the mosquito it stops sucking!!
Q. What does a blonde say the last two words of the national anthem are?
A. Play ball!

Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?
A: Gifted!
Q: How do blonde braincells die?
A: Alone.
Q: How do you brainwash a blonde?
A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down.
Q: What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette?
A: Artificial intelligence.
Q: How does a blonde part their hair?
A: (Action of scissoring legs apart)
Q: Why do blondes wash their hair in the sink?
A: Because, that's where you're supposed to wash vegetables!
Q: What was the blond psychic's greatest achievment?
A: An IN-body experience!
Q: When does a brunette have 1/2 of a brain?
A: After a dye job.
Q: Why is the blonde's brain the size of a pea in the morning?
A: It swells at night.
Q: Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane?
A1: She'd just dyed her hair.
A2: She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much.
Q: Why do blondes wear their hair up?
A: To catch as more...

Three women are about to be executed. One's a brunette, one's a redhead, and one's a blond. Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.
She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready. . . Aim. . . " Suddenly the brunette yells, "earthquake!!" Everyone is startled and looks around. She manages to escape. The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.
She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready. . . Aim. . . " The redhead then screams, "tornado!!" Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution. By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.
She also says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready. . . Aim. . . "
The blond shouts, "fire!!"

There were eleven people hanging onto a rope that came down from an airplane.
Ten were blonde, and one was a brunette.
They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn't, the rope would break and everyone would die.
No one could decide who should go, so finally the brunette said, "I'll get off."
After a really touching speech from the brunette saying she would get off, all of the blondes started clapping.
Problem solved.