Cake Jokes / Recent Jokes

A mother and her seven year old are walking by the park, and they see two squirrles mating.The little girl asks "Mommy what are they doing."The mother replies "They are baking a cake."
A few days later they walk by the park and they see two dogs mating, The daughter asks if they are baking a cake to?
The mother replies yes.
The next morning the daughter comes up to her mom and says "Mommy I saw you and Daddy baking a cake last night and I licked the icing off"

One day a man and a lady decided to go to a nude beach and they had to bring along their 10 year old daughter. Well while the three were walking to their hotel room the daughter asked her parents what were the other men and women were doing and they told her that they were making a cake.So that night the mother and the father were in the room while the daughter was sleep in the livingroom of the hotel. And the daughter heard the noises of the so called"Cake baking". When they got up in the mornig the daughter asked the mother and the father what was all the noises and they told her they was baking a cake and she said well I licked all the iceing off the cake.

Which candles burn longer, the candles on a girl's cake or a boy's cake?
No candles burn longer. They all burn shorter.

Q: How many Jo Brands does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, you give it to a bloody man to do, cos it's a piece of cake, isn't it? Well, no, actually, that expression is crap isn't it, because if you had a piece of cake, you'd bloody well eat it, wouldn't you?

Two weeks after returning from their honeymoon, Mr. Smith comes home from work and informs his wife that he's invited four of his office buddies for dinner on Friday night. Feeling apprehensive, his wife asks if she must cook dinner for the four. The husband explains that there won't be only four coming, there will be eight since each will be bringing his wife.
Seeing her nervousness, since this will be their first party, the husband consoles her by saying all she will have to do is order in some Chinese food and maybe she could bake a cake.
On Friday morning, the wife calls her husband at the office and she's in tears. She tells him that the only cake recipe she has will only feed six.
"Then just double the recipe," he says.
"I can't. It's impossible," she sobs.
"Why can't you?" he asks.
"The recipe calls for two eggs," she replies.
"Well, use FOUR eggs. Don't you have four eggs?" he asks.
"Yes, more...

BOY: Since we met, I can't eat or drink...
GIRL: Why not? ?
BOY: I'm broke.

BOY: May I hold your hand??
GIRL: No thanks, it isn't heavy.

GIRL: Who was that girl I saw you kissing last night??
BOY: What time was it??

GIRL: Say you love me! Say you love me!
BOY: You love me...

GIRL: If we become engaged will you give me a ring??
BOY: Sure, what's your phone number??

GIRL: Darling, I want to dance like this forever..
BOY: Don't you ever want to improve??

BOY: I love you and I could die for you!
GIRL: How soon??

SHARON: Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss??
TRACY: I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.

Man: You remind me of the sea.
Woman: Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?
Man: NO, because you make me sick.

Wife: You tell a man something, it goes in one ear and comes out
of the more...

Why did you hit your birthday cake with a hammer? Because you said it was pound cake!