Email Jokes / Recent Jokes

Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well lighted area with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils.
Check your email.
Read over the assignment carefully, to make certain you understand it.
Walk down to the vending machines and buy some coffee to help you concentrate.
Check your email.
Stop off at another floor, on the way back and visit with your friend from class. If your friend hasn't started the paper yet either, you can both walk to McDonalds and buy a hamburger to help you concentrate. If your friend shows you her paper, typed, double-spaced, and bound in one of those irritating see-through plastic folders, drop her.
When you get back to your room, sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a clean, well lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils.
Read over the assignment again to make absolutely certain you understand it.
Check your email.
You know, you haven't written to that kid you met at camp since fourth grade. You'd better more...

A SRI LANKAN MOTHER comes to visit her son Sunil who lives
with a female roommate naming Sunita, for dinner. During the course of the meal, his mother could not help but notice how pretty Sunil's, roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Sunil and his roommate than met the eye. Reading his mom's thoughts, Sunil volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Sunita and I are just roommates."
About a week later, Sunita came to Sunil saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver chutney jar.
You don't suppose she took it, do you?"
"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure." So he
sat down and wrote:
Dear Mom,

I'm not saying that you' did' take the more...