Ghost Jokes / Recent Jokes
A small ghost was sitting in a haunted house all alone when another ghost came in. It said,' Hello, I'm your long lost brother.'
The first ghost replied.' ooooo?'
Student l: "Did you know that ghosts are protected by the Constitution?" Student 2: "They are?" Student 1: "Sure. Its in the Bill of Frights!"
A visiting professor at Texas A & M University is giving a seminar on the supernatural. To get a feel for his audience, he asks: "How many people here believe in ghosts?" About 90 students raise their hands.
"Well that's a good start. Out of those of you who believe in ghosts, do any of you think you've ever seen a ghost?" About 40 students raise their hands.
"That's really good. I'm really glad you take this seriously. Has anyone here ever talked to a ghost? 15 students raise their hands.
"That's a great response. Has anyone here ever touched a ghost?" Three students raise their hands. "That's fantastic. But let me ask you one question further..... Have any of you ever made love to a ghost?" One student in the back raises his hand. The professor is astonished. He takes off his glasses, takes a step back, and says, "Son, all the years I've been giving this lecture, no one has ever claimed to have slept more...
Three boys were walking along the beach one day when they see a cave. The first boy goes in and is looking at a banknote on a big rock when a ghostly voice calls out I am the ghost of Auntie Abel and this five dollars stays on the table! The second boy goes in and is reaching for the money when the same thing happens again. The third boy goes in, sees the five dollars and cries out, I am the ghost of David Crockett and this five dollars goes in my pocket!
The Society of the Paranormal was having a convention in town and there were many attendees. The president of the society was at the podium delivering the opening address to all who were there in body and in spirit, and he asked the question:
"Who of you have had the occasion to see a ghost?". There was a showing of perhaps forty hands, to which the speaker asked,
"Who of you have had the occasion to speak with a ghost?". Once again the conventioneers raised hands, counting thirty or so.
Then the question, "Who of you have had the occaison to have actually touched a ghost?", to which about ten hands were waved about. The speaker paused for a moment, and then delivered another query,
"Who of you have had the occasion to have sex with a ghost?", and in the far back of the auditorium a lone hand was raised.
"Would the usher please escort that individual with his hand raised to the stage? I simply must inquire more...