Nixon Jokes / Recent Jokes
Richard Nixon, Jimmy Carter, and Bill Clinton are on the titanic. When it starts to sink Carter yells, "Quick, save the women and children!" Nixon: "Screw the women and children" Clinton: "Do we have time?"
Similarities between Nixon and Clinton
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Nixon: Watergate
Clinton: Waterbed
Nixon: His biggest fear - the Cold War
Clinton: His biggest fear - a Cold Sore
Nixon: Worried about carpet bombs
Clinton: Worried about carpet burns
Nixon: His Vice President was a Greek
Clinton: His Vice President is a geek
Nixon: Couldn't stop Kissinger
Clinton: Couldn't stop kissing her
Nixon: Couldn't explain the 18 minute gap in the Watergate tape
Clinton: Couldn't explain the 36-DD bra in his brief case
Nixon: His nickname was Tricky Dick
Clinton: same
Nixon: Ex-President
Clinton: Sex-President
Nixon: Known for campaign slogan "Nixon's The One"
Clinton: Known for women pointing at him saying, "He's the one!"
N? xon: Famous for his widow's peak
Clinton: Famous for bringing widows to their peak
Nixon: Well acquainted with G. Gordon Liddy
Clinton: Well acquainted with the G Spot
Nixon: Took more...
"Similarities between presidents Richard Nixon and Bill Clinton":
Nixon: Watergate Clinton: Water Bed
Nixon: His biggest fear: the Cold War Clinton: His biggest fear: a Cold Sore
Nixon: Carpet bombing Clinton: Carpet burns
Nixon: His Vice President was a Greek Clinton: His Vice President is a geek
Nixon: Couldn't stop Kissinger Clinton: Couldn't stop kissing her
Nixon: Couldn't explain the 18-minute gap in the Watergate tape Clinton: Couldn't explain the 38-DD bra in his briefcase
Nixon: His nickname was Tricky Dick Clinton: No difference
Nixon: Ex-President Clinton: Sex-President
Nixon: Known for campaign slogan "Nixon's The One" Clinton: Know for women pointing at him and say "He's the one"
Nixon: Famous for his widow's peak Clinton: Famous for bringing widows to their peak
Nixon: Well acquainted with G. Gordon Liddy Clinton: Well acquainted with G Spot
Nixon: Talked about achieving peace with more...
Nixon:Watergate
Clinton:Waterbed
Nixon:His biggest fear - the Cold War
Clinton:His biggest fear - a Cold Sore
Nixon:Worried about carpet bombs
Clinton:Worried about carpet burns
Nixon:His Vice President was a Greek
Clinton:His Vice President is a geek
Nixon:Couldn't stop Kissinger
Clinton:Couldn't stop kissing her
Nixon:Couldn't explain the 18 minute gap in the Watergate tape
Clinton:Couldn't explain the 36-DD bra in his brief case
Nixon:His nickname was Tricky Dick
Clinton:same
Nixon:Ex-President
Clinton:Sex-President
Nixon:Known for campaign slogan "Nixon's The One"
Clinton:Known for women pointing at him saying, "He's the one!"
Nixon:Famous for his widow's peak
Clinton:Famous for bringing widows to their peak
Nixon:Well acquainted with G. Gordon Liddy
Clinton:Well acquainted with the G Spot
Nixon:Took on Ho Chi Minh
Clinton:Took on Ho
Nixon:Talked about achieving more...
"I want to make sure everybody who has a job wants a job" -George Bush, during his first Presidential campaign
"This is a great day for France!" -Richard Nixon, while attending Charles De Gaulle's funeral
"Now, like, I'm President. It would be pretty hard for some drug guy to come into the White House and start offering it up, you know?... I bet if they did, I hope I would say, 'Hey, get lost. We don't want any of that.'" -George Bush, talking about drug abuse to a group of students
"For seven and a half years I've worked alongside President Reagan. We've had triumphs. Made some mistakes. We've had some sex... uh... setbacks." -George Bush
"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy. But that could change." -Dan Quayle
"Hawaii has always been a very pivotal role in the Pacific. It is in the Pacific. It is a part of the United States that is an island that is right here." more...
Nixon: WaterGate.
Clinton: ZipperGate.
Nixon: His Vice President was a Greek.
Clinton: His Vice President is a geek.
Nixon: Couldn't stop Kissinger.
Clinton: Couldn't stop kissing her.