Notes Jokes / Recent Jokes
____________________University
To: Professor____________________ From: __________________I think my grade in your course, ___________________, should be
changed from ______ to _______ for the following reasons:
______1. The persons who copied my paper made a higher grade than I did.
______2. The person whose paper I copied made a higher grade than I did.
______3. This course will lower my Grade Point Average and I won't get into:
______ Law School
______Medical School ______Graduate School
______Dental School ______My Fraternity/Sorority
______The Mickey Mouse Club ______Tri County Tech
______4. I have to get an A in this course to balance the F in
_______________.
______5. I'll lose my scholarship.
______6. I'm on a varsity sports team and my tutor couldn't find a copy of your exam.
______7. I didn't come to class and the person whose notes I used did not cover the material asked for on the exam.
______8. I studied the basic more...
A nun asked her class to write notes to God. Here are some of the notes the children handed in: Dear God: I didn't think orange went with purple until I saw the sunset you made on Tuesday. That was cool. Dear God: Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones, why don't You just keep the ones You have? Dear God: Maybe Cain and Abel would not have killed each other so much if they had their own rooms. That's what my Mom did for me and my brother. Dear God: If You watch me in church on Sunday, I'll show You my new shoes. Dear God: I bet it is very hard for You to love all of everybody in the whole world. There are only 4 people in our family and I'm having a hard time loving all of them. Dear God: In school they told us what You do. Who does it when You're on vacation? Dear God: Are You really invisible or is it just a trick? Dear God: Is it true my father won't get in Heaven if he uses his bowling words in the house? Dear God: Did You mean for the Giraffe to look like that more...
____________________UniversityTo: Professor____________________ From: __________________I think my grade in your course, ___________________, should bechanged from ______ to _______ for the following reasons:______1. The persons who copied my paper made a higher grade than I did.______2. The person whose paper I copied made a higher grade than I did.______3. This course will lower my Grade Point Average and I won't get into:______ Law School______Medical School ______Graduate School______Dental School ______My Fraternity/Sorority______The Mickey Mouse Club ______Tri County Tech______4. I have to get an A in this course to balance the F in_______________.______5. I'll lose my scholarship.______6. I'm on a varsity sports team and my tutor couldn't find a copy of your exam.______7. I didn't come to class and the person whose notes I used did not cover the material asked for on the exam.______8. I studied the basic principles and the exam wanted every little fact.______9. I learned all more...
My friend invented Cliff's Notes. When I asked him how he got such a great idea, he said, "Well, first I... I just... well, to make a long story short... "
Did you hear about the violist who bragged he could play 32nd notes?
The rest of the orchestra didn't believe him, so he proved it by playing one.
Three icehockey fans were on their way to a game when one noticed a foot
sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road.
They stopped and discovered a nude female dead drunk. Out of respect and
propriety, the Jokerit fan took off his cap and placed it over her right breast.
The TPS fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast. Following their
lead, the HIFK fan took off his cap and placed it over her crotch.
The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his
inspection. First, he lifted up the Jokerit cap, replaced it, and wrote down
some notes. Next, he lifted the TPS cap, replaced it, and wrote down some more
notes. The officer then lifted the HIFK cap, replaced it, then lifted it again,
replaced it, lifted it a third time, and replaced it one last time.
The HIFK fan was getting upset and finally asked, "What are you, a pervert or
something? Why do you keep lifting and looking, lifting and more...
A Russian man saves his rubles for twenty years to buy a new car.
After choosing the model and options he wants, he's not the least bit surprised or even concerned to learn that it will take two years for the new car to be delivered.
He thanks the salesman and starts to leave, but as he reaches the door he pauses and turns back to the salesman "Do you know which week two years from now the new car will arrive?" he asks.
The salesman checks his notes and tells the man that it will be two years to the exact week.
The man thanks the salesman and starts out again, but upon reaching the door, he turns back again.
"Could you possibly tell me what day of the week two years from now the car will arrive?"
The salesman, mildly annoyed, checks his notes again and says that it will be exactly two years from this week, on Thursday. The man thanks the salesman and once again starts to leave.
Halfway though more...