Order Jokes / Recent Jokes

Alyssa Milano has sought a temporary restraining order against a man she says has been stalker. Her official statement read: "I have stated time and time again, no Mr. Danza, I will not do a Who's the Boss? reunion."

A waiter approached the man studying the menu carefully at the fancy restaurant. "May I take your order, sir?" he asked."Well, I was wondering how you prepare your chickens." The man replied."Oh, it's nothing too special, sir," the waiter confided. "We just tell them straight out that they're going to die."

A fathers rules to dating;
Rule One - If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.
Rule Two - You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.
Rule Three - I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, In order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and more...

1. Stand close to the speaker and yell your order, using colorful expletives in ways which would embarrass the patrons inside.
2. Drive through backwards.
3. Belch your order.
4. After ordering, cover the speaker and mic with transparent tape. Watch as customers and order-takers are unable to hear each other and, thus, each raises his/her volume.
5. Barter. Offer a Whopper for a Big Mac.
6. Walk through.
7. Speak a foreign language (make one up if you have to). When the manager comes to the mic, speak English and inquire as to why the order taker had such difficulty understanding you.
8. Repeat everything the order-taker says.
9. Attempt to take the order-takers order (”Hi, may I take your order? ”) before they get a chance to take yours.
10. Order confusing items, i. e., “Hi, I’ll have a large orange Coke and a small medium fries, please”.
11. In a crowded drive-thru line, place a HUGE order, then slip out of line and watch more...

This elderly couple is sitting on a park bench if from of a large pond. Across the other side of the pond are vendors sell all types of food stuff. The wife turns to hubby and say, "I could really go for an ice cream cone."
Hubby replies, "Well, I'll go get you one."
Wife says, "But, you'll forget, you better write it down."
Hubby replies, "No I won't; what do you want?"
Wife says, "Get me a Strawberry cone with chocolate sprinkles."
Hubby replies, "Okay, strawberry cone with chocolate sprinkles. See, I'll remember.
Several hours pass and, finally, the hubby returns.
The wife asks him, "What took you so long, did you get lost."
The hubby replies, "No, and I got what you wanted."
The wife opens the bag to discover a cheeseburger and fries?!
Wife says, "I knew you you should have written the order down."
Hubby says, "What do you mean - every thing is more...

This elderly couple is sitting on a park bench if from of a large pond. Across the other side of the pond are vendors sell all types of food stuff. The wife turns to hubby and say, "I could really go for an ice cream cone."Hubby replies, "Well, I'll go get you one."Wife says, "But, you'll forget, you better write it down."Hubby replies, "No I won't; what do you want?"Wife says, "Get me a Strawberry cone with chocolate sprinkles."Hubby replies, "Okay, strawberry cone with chocolate sprinkles. See, I'll remember.Several hours pass and, finally, the hubby returns.The wife asks him, "What took you so long, did you get lost."The hubby replies, "No, and I got what you wanted."The wife opens the bag to discover a cheeseburger and fries?! Wife says, "I knew you you should have written the order down."Hubby says, "What do you mean - every thing is there?"To which the wife replies, "No, it's more...

A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great deal of money.
The distributor noticed that the previous bill hadn't been paid. The collections manager left a voice-mail for them saying, "We can't ship your new order until you pay for the last one."
The next day the collections manager received a collect phone call, "Please cancel the order. We can't wait that long."