Silver Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms.
Clearly impressed, he buys a pack.
Upon getting home he shows his wife the purchase he just made.
"Olympic condoms?", she blurts, "What makes them so special?"
"They're in three colours", he replies, "Gold, Silver and Bronze."
"What colour are you going to wear tonight?", she asks cheekily.
"Gold of course", says the man proudly!
The wife responds wryly, "Why don't you wear Silver, it would be nice if you came second for a change!".

Three men (an Aussie, an Irish bloke and a German fella) are in an old plane trying to make it around the world. As they pass Germany, the German fella yells, "I love my country!" and throws a bag of gold overboard.
When they pass Ireland, the Irish bloke shouts, "I love my country!" and throws a bag of silver overboard.
When they pass Australia, the Aussie yells, "I hate my country!" and he throws a bomb overboard.
They finished their flight soon thereafter. When the German gets back to his country, he walks along happily until he sees a small boy crying. "What's wrong?" he asks. "Can I help?"
The little boy cries, "A bag of gold hit my mother on the head, and now she's unconscious in the hospital." The German walks away, feeling sorry for the little fella.
When the Irish bloke gets to his country, he sees a little girl crying in the street, and he asks her what's wrong. The little girl replies, "My more...

10. Doves released during opening ceremonies are promptly shot by the crowd and sold as concession snacks.
9. In an amazing coincidence, every proposed Olympic venue turns out to be owned by the Governor.
8. The big event is the 100m Sisterchase.
7. Instead of shooting at boring targets, archers take aim at muskrats and ATF agents.
6. Urine drug test transformed into "Distance Pissin Competition."
5. Olympic Village replaced with Olympic Trailer Park.
4. Awards of gold, silver and bronze medals replaced by award of gold, silver, and bronze teeth.
3. Opening Ceremony is a Skynyrd tape and a trunk full of bottle rockets.
2. Hometown favorites falter in gymnastics competitions due to all them extra toes.
1. Two words: Billy Bobsledding.

A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms.
Clearly impressed, he buys a pack. Upon getting home he announces to his wife the purchase he just made.
"Olympic condoms?" she blurts, "What makes them so special?"
"There are three colours", he replies, "Gold, Silver and Bronze."
"What colour are you going to wear tonight?" she asks cheekily.
"Gold of course," says the man proudly.
The wife responds, "Why don't you wear Silver, it would be nice if you came second for a change!"

Worried because they hadn't heard anything for days from the widow in the neighboring apartment, Mrs. Silver said to her son, "Timmy, would you go next door and see how old Mrs. Kirkland is?" A few minutes later, Timmy returned. "Well," asked Mrs. Silver, "is she all right?" "She's fine, except that she's angry at you." "At me?" the woman exclaimed. "Whatever for?" "She said' It's none of your business how old she is,'" snickered Timmy.

A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms.Clearly impressed, he buys a pack.Upon getting home he shows his wife the purchase he just made."Olympic condoms?", she blurts, "What makes them so special?""They're in three colours", he replies, "Gold, Silver and Bronze.""What colour are you going to wear tonight?", she asks cheekily."Gold of course", says the man proudly! The wife responds wryly, "Why don't you wear Silver, it would be nice if you came second for a change!".

A man went over to his girl's place for a little bit of nookie between the sheets. He presented her with three choices of condom - gold, silver, or bronze.
"Silver," she said.
"Why not gold?"
"Be nice if you'd come second for once!"