"Company Cars" joke

The Company Car
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1. It accelerates at a phenominal rate.
2. It has a much shorter braking distance than the private
car.
3. It can take speed humps at twice the speed of private
cars.
4. The battery, radiator water, oil and tyres never have to
be checked.
5. The floor is cunningly designed to double as an ashtray.
6. It does not need to be kept under shelter at night.
7. It can be driven up to 60 miles with the oil warning light
flashing.
8. It needs cleaning less often than private cars.
9. The suspension is reinforced to allow for the weekend
loads of bricks, concrete slabs and other building
material.
10. Unusual and alarming engine noises are easily eliminated
by turning up the radio.
11. It needs no security system and may be left anywhere,
unlocked and with the keys in the ignition.
12. It is the only type of car able to leave the road in game
reserves and chase after animals in the bush for a closer
look.
13. It is specially sand and waterproof for barbeques and
fishing expeditions on remote beaches.