"That bird is no help." joke
A man suspected his wife of cheating on him. so he decided to buy a talking parrot to tell him what goes on while he's at work. He looks all over, and all he can find is a parrot with no legs, buts he's desperate, so he buys it.
He sets the parrots cage up, and props the bird up, and the next day he tells the parrot, "pay careful attention to what goes on today.
So the man goes to work, and about 2 hours later, the woman come in with the mailman. The parrot looks at them carefully so he can tell the man everything.
When the man comes home, he asks to parrot, "so what happened?" "Well", the parrot started "she came in with the mail man, and they started kissing, and he started to undress her.." Then the parrot stopped. "Well!! What else happened??"
The parrot said, I dont know, I popped a boner and fell over."
Not enough votes...