Bull Jokes / Recent Jokes

An old farmer is having trouble getting his bull to breed with the cows and is lamenting the fact to a few of his friends down at his local. One of them says, "You know, I used to have the same trouble with my bull, but I got it fixed really quick."
"How did you get it fixed?"
"Well I just dipped my finger in the cow's vagina and rubbed it all over the bull's nose and he got right after her."
He goes home to the farm and decides to try it. He grabs a cow, dips his fingers in the cow's vagina and rubs it all around the bull's nose. The bull gets a rip roaring boner and jumps on the cow immediately.
That night, he gets into bed with his wife and can't get the effect on the bull out of his mind. As she lays sleeping, he dips his fingers into his wife's vagina and feeling that it's nice and wet, he rubs it all around his nose and gets a rip roaring hard on. He quickly shakes his wife awake and cries out, "Darling. Look at more...

12 year old timmy and 4 year old jimmy and their mom were sitting down and watching television when the red bull comercial appeared. timmy can you buy me a red bull? jimmy asked
im not old enough to go to the store.
ok said timmy
a few minutes later little jimmy had finished his red bull and was now looking over his shoulders
jimmy what are you looking for asked his brother
jimmy replied where the fuck is my wings!!!

A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher's prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull. The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace in the back room of the general store. The attorney for the railroad immediately cornered the rancher and tried to get him to settle out of court. The lawyer did his best selling job, and finally the rancher agreed to take half of what he was asking. After the rancher had signed the release and took the check, the young lawyer couldn't resist gloating a little over his success, telling the rancher, "You know, I hate to tell you this, old man, but I put one over on you in there. I couldn't have won the case. The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your ranch that morning. I didn't have one witness to put on the stand. I bluffed more...

A big-city lawyer was representing the railroad in a lawsuit filed by an old rancher. The rancher's prize bull was missing from the section through which the railroad passed. The rancher only wanted to be paid the fair value of the bull. The case was scheduled to be tried before the justice of the peace in the back room of the general store. The city-slicker attorney for the railroad immediately cornered the rancher and tried to get him to settle out of court. He did his best selling job, and finally the rancher agreed to take half of what he was asking. After the rancher had signed the release and took the check, the young lawyer couldn't resist gloating a little over his success, telling the rancher, "You are really a country hick, old man, but I put one over on you in there. I couldn't have won the case. The engineer was asleep and the fireman was in the caboose when the train went through your ranch that morning. I didn't have one witness to put on the stand. I bluffed more...

A huge truck driver is sitting at a bar having a drink when this little pipsqueak of a guy walks in and asks who owns the pit bull outside.
The truck driver hollers "It's MY dog! What's it to you!"
The little runt says, "Nothing, but I think my dog just killed yours..."
The truck driver jumps up and says "WHAT! What kind of dog do you have anyway?"
The other guy replies "A toy poodle."
"A poodle!" the truck driver yells. "How in the hell can a poodle kill a pit bull?!"
"Well," replied the little guy, "I think he choked on it."

A drunk walks into a bar one night and reads a sign on the wall that says "Ask me about our contest".

"What's this about your contest?" the drunk queried.

"Oh yeah," the bartender said, "we have this contest going. If you can hit the bull's eye three times in a row, you win a prize."

"I think I might try your contest," the drunk replied. "Give me a drink."

So the bartender fixes him a drink, the man glugs it down, and throws the dart. BANG! It hits the bull's eye.

"Fix me two drinks!" the drunk says. The bartender complies. The man throws a second dart and BAM! it hits the bull's eye.

"Wow! Nobody's ever done two before!" the bartender cried in awe.

"Yeah, well fix me three drinks!" the man says, and the bartender does. BAM! a third dart hits the bull's eye. By this point, the man is sloppy drunk. "What do I more...

Farmer: I've got a bull that's right off it duties. It's got to service
300 cows and all it wants to do is eat.
Vet: Give it one of these little pills in its feed and stand back.

So 2 weeks later the farmer comes back to the vet:

Farmer: WOW, what a pill! I gave the pill to the bull like you said and
POW! It jumped over the gate, ran down the lane and fucked 70 cows in
30 minutes.
Vet: So, what's the problem - why have you come back?
Farmer: Well, I was wondering, I am meeting this 18-year-old tonight -
could you give me one of those tablets? I'm not as young as I was.
Vet: Oh, no! Sorry, it's too strong but I will give you a quarter of a
pill.

So the farmer takes the pill and goes off to prepare for his date.
Several days later, the farmer goes back to the Vet.

Farmer: Hello, Vet. Wonderful. 40 Times.
Vet: So, why have you come back?
Farmer: Ah! I need something for my wrist - she more...