Carjacking Jokes / Recent Jokes

An elderly lady did her shopping and upon return found 4 males in her car. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at them at the top of her lungs that she "knows how to use it and will shoot if required.... so get out of MY car!"The 4 men didn't wait around for a second invitation. They got out and ran like mad, where upon the lady proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the drivers seat.Small problem: Her key wouldn't fit the ignition. Her car was identical and parked four or five spaces further down.She loaded her bags into her car and drove to the police station. The sergeant that she told the story to nearly tore himself in two with laughter and pointed to the other end of the counter where 4 pale white males were reporting a carjacking by a mad, elderly, white woman...... No charges were filed.

An Elderly Lady Did Her Shopping And, Upon Returning To Her Car, Found Four Males In The Act Of Leaving With Her Vehicle. She Dropped Her Shopping Bags, Drew Her Handgun, And Proceeded To Scream At Them At The Top Of Her Voice, "I Have A Gun And I Know How To Use It! Get Out Of The Car, You Scumbags!"

The Four Men Didn't Wait For A Second Invitation, But Got Out And Ran Like Mad.

The Lady, Somewhat Shaken, Proceeded To Load Her Shopping Bags In The Back Of The Car And Get Into The Driver's Seat. She Was So Shaken That She Could Not Get Her Key Into The Ignition. She Tried And Tried, To No Avail.

And Then It Dawned On Her Why.

A Few Minutes Later, She Found Her Own Car Parked Four Or Five Spaces Farther Down. She Loaded Her Bags Into Her Car And Drove To The Police Station.

The Sergeant To Whom She Told The Story Nearly Tore Himself In Two With Laughter And Pointed To The Other End Of The Counter, Where Four Pale Males more...

An elderly lady did her shopping and upon return found 4 males in her car. She dropped her shopping bags and drew her handgun, proceeding to scream at them at the top of her lungs that she "knows how to use it and will shoot if required.... so get out of MY car!"
The 4 men didn't wait around for a second invitation. They got out and ran like mad, where upon the lady proceeded to load her shopping bags into the back of the car and got into the drivers seat.
Small problem: Her key wouldn't fit the ignition. Her car was identical and parked four or five spaces further down.
She loaded her bags into her car and drove to the police station. The sergeant that she told the story to nearly tore himself in two with laughter and pointed to the other end of the counter where 4 pale white males were reporting a carjacking by a mad, elderly, white woman...... No charges were filed.