Chain Jokes / Recent Jokes
YOU WILL EXPERIENCE GREAT SEX within four days of receiving this letter, provided you send it on. Since the copy must tour the world, you must make ten copies and send them to others. This is no joke. Send no money. Send copies to people who need to GET LAID within 96 hours.
After he passed this letter on, a Montana Spinach Control Officer got his penis stuck in a cow-milking machine and had the longest series of orgasms of his life.
John Elliot tried to pick up a prostitute, but, because he broke the chain, was picked up by the police instead. When they searched his home, they found magazines of little boys which they showed to his neighbors.
In a suburb of Paris, Don Loray's trousers were ripped by an unsatisfied erection 51 days after failing to circulate the letter. However, before this happened, a condom machine gave him three condoms for the price of one (was this the consolation prize?).
Do note the following: Hebert Pudstrom received more...
Chain Letter Type IVAs if you care, here is a poem that I wrote. Send it to every one of yourfriends. Friends- A friend is someone who is always at your side,- A friend is someone who likes you even though you smell like a wet dog,- A friend is someone who likes you even though you're disgustingly ugly,- A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've soiled yourself,- A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry about your loser life,- A friend is someone who pretends they like you when they really think you should be raped by a mad goat and then thrown to vicious dogs, - Afriend is someone who scrubs your toilet and vacuums and then gets the check and leaves and doesn't speak much English no, sorry that's the cleaning lady, Now pass this on! If you don't, Satan will send dogs in heat to your room inyour sleep!! There. Now that we've covered and dumped on the four main types of chainletters, onto the ironic part. In order for this to get any popularity, send more...
You will experience great sex within four days of receiving this letter, provided you pass it on (use the "Email This To A Friend or Social Bookmark It!" above or post a link on your favorite message board or blog). Since the copy must tour the world, you must make ten copies and send them to others. This is no joke. Send no money. Send copies to people who need to get laid within 96 hours. Don't believe this is serious business? Read some of these true stories:
* After he passed this letter on, a Montana Spinach Control Officer got his penis stuck in a cow-milking machine and had the longest series of orgasms of his life.
* John Elliot tried to pick up a prostitute, but, because he broke the chain, was picked up by the police instead. When they searched his home, they found magazines of little boys which they showed to his neighbors.
* In a suburb of Paris, Don Loray's trousers were ripped by an unsatisfied erection, 51 days after failing to circulate the more...
A guy arrives at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted.
St. Peter is leafing through the Big Book to see if the guy is worthy of entering. After several minutes, St. Peter closes the book, furrows his brow, and says,' I don't really see that you ever really did anything great in your life, but I don't see anything really bad either.'
'Tell you what,' St. Peter says.' If you can tell me of one REALLY good deed you did in your life, I'll let you in.'
The guy thinks for a moment and says,' OK, well there was this one time when I was driving down the highway and I saw a gang assaulting this poor girl. I slowed down, and sure enough, there they were, about 50 of' em torturing this woman. Infuriated, I got out my car, grabbed a tire iron out of my trunk, and walked straight up to the leader of the gang. He was a huge guy with a studded leather jacket and a chain running from his nose to his ear. As I walked up to the leader, the gang members formed a more...
Dear Friend,
This letter was started by a woman like yourself in hopes of bringing relief to other tired and discontented women. Unlike most chain letters, this one does not cost anything. Just bundle up yur husband and send him to the woman whose name appears at the top of the list. Then add your name to the bottom of the list and send a copy of this to five of your friends who are equally tired and discontented.
When your name comes to the top of the list, you will receive 3,325 men... and one of them are bound to be better than the one you gave up!
DO NOT BREAK THIS CHAIN... one woman did, and received her own jerk back!
At this writing, a friend of mine had already received 184 men; they buried her yesterday but it took four undertakers 36 hours to get the smile off her face.
We're counting on you,
A Satisified Woman
What do chain saws and monkeys have in common? They both fuck up trees!