Convinced Jokes

You might be a child of the 80's if...... you have deep, personal relationships via computer with people you've never met in real life.... the phrase "going courting", to you, means fighting an unjust traffic ticket or playing tennis.... you know, by heart, the words to any "Weird" Al Yankovic song.... not that you'd do it personally, but body piercing captivates your attention.... you remember the days when cocaine was just fine in powder form, thankyouverymuch.... you think the "the Gay 90's" refers to this decade and sexual orientation.... the Brady Bunch movie brought back cool memories.... you remember the first time "Space: Above and Beyond" aired - it was called "Battlestar Galactica".... songs by Debbie Gibson still haunt you to this day.... three words: "Atari" "IntelliVision" and "Coleco". Sound familiar?... you remember the days that hooking your computer into your television wasn't an expensive more...

A man came home from the Social Security Office. "Honey," he said to his wife, "I finally convinced them that I'm old enough to collect Social Security."
"How?" his wife asked. "Since the department of records in the small town you were born in was flooded, you can't get a copy of your birth certificate."
"I know," the man replied, "I just unbuttoned my shirt and showed them all the gray hairs on my chest. That convinced them that I'm old enough."
His wife retorted, "Then while you were at it, why didn't you whip out your pecker and get disability, too?!"

A man came home from the Social Security Office. 'Honey,' he said to his wife, 'I finally convinced them that I'm old enough to collect Social Security.'
'How?' his wife asked. 'Since the department of records in the small town you were born in was flooded, you can't get a copy of your birth certificate.'
'I know,' the man replied, 'I just unbuttoned my shirt and showed them all the gray hairs on my chest. That convinced them that I'm old enough.'
His wife retorted, 'Then while you were at it, why didn't you whip out your dick and get disability, too?!'

a male bear an a male rabbit r walkin through the junglewen they come across a frog the frog says ill give u both three wishes the bear says i wish all the bears in this area were female bears the rabbit says i wish for a helmet*poof*the rabbit gets the helmet so the bear is convinced the bear says i wish that all bears in scotland were female bears the rabbit says i wish for a motor bike the bear is convinced wen the rabbit gets the helmet the bear then says i wish that all the bears in the world were female bears the rabbit is driving off wen he shoutes bak I WISH THE BEAR WAS GAY

Arthur Conan Doyle, author of the Sherlock Holmes stories, was convinced that the dead could communicate with the living. Once, shortly after the death of a fellow writer, he was asked if he had heard from the deceased. He admitted that he had not.
'Are you convinced now,' continued his questioner,' that spiritualism is a fake?'
'Not at all,' replied Doyle,' I hadn't expected him to contact me. We weren't on speaking terms when he died.'