Corner Jokes / Recent Jokes

A gay guy walks into a bar and says "bartender give me a brewskie." The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here." The gay continues, "I'll just sit in the corner and drink my beer and won't say anything." The bartender says, "Well, all right!" and pours a beer. A while later a cowboy walks in and says "Bartender give me a beer! I'm so thirsty I could lick the sweat off a cow's balls" A voice is heard from the corner. "Moo! Moo! Buckaroo!"

The Rookie Cop...

A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering.

The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner.

The rookie rolled down his window and said, "Let's get off the corner people."
A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again...
"I SAID, let's get off that corner... NOW!"

Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction.

Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?"

Pretty good," chuckled the vet, "especially since this is a bus stop!"

My friend told me not long ago that my old best friend came back in town a few days ago. I said which friend would that be? He said your old friend bubbles.
I was looking for bubbles when he walked around the corner and said hey girl you remember me???
Later on that day my friend walked up to me and said you blew bubbles when you were younger and i know it because i was there.we blew bubbles together. he walks around the corner and says yes i had such a great time with you two when i was younger.

Who Says a "Blonde" is Stupid?
When she took me to the airport and saw a sign that said, "Airport left", she turned around and went home.
She has one toe, and bought a pair of flip flops.
She put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.
She got stabbed in a shoot-out.
She told me to meet her at the corner of "Walk" and "Don't Walk".
When the computer said "Press any key to continue", she couldn't find the "Any" key.
She thought 2Pac Shakur was a Jewish Holiday.
When I was drowning and yelled for a life saver, she said, "Cherry or Grape?"
She sat on the TV and watched the couch.
She sent me a fax with a stamp on it.
She was on the corner giving out potato chips, yelling, "Free Lays!".
She tried to drown her goldfish.
She thought a quarterback was a refund.
She got locked in a grocery store and nearly starved to death.
If you more...

The traffic light wasn't working on the corner of Broadway and 72nd Street, so the blonde stood with a large crowd of
people waiting to cross, while a cop directed traffic.Finally, the cop blew his whistle, motioned to the crowd, and shouted, "Okay, pedestrians!" The throng surged across
Broadway -- all except the blonde, who stayed on the corner.When the walkers were safely on the other side of the street, the cop moved the cross-traffic through the intersection. Half a minute later, he stopped the cars on Broadway and sent
the 72nd Street traffic into motion.Again, he got around to the blonde's corner, where by this time she had again been joined by a crowd of people.Tweeeeeeeet! "Okay, pedestrians!"The crowd crossed the street, but again the blonde stayed put. She looked at her watch and tapped her foot but never budged from the sidewalk.Finally, after the cop yelled "Okay, pedestrians!" for the third time, the blonde shouted across more...

The traffic light wasn't working on the corner of Broadway and 72nd Street, so the blonde stood with a large crowd of
people waiting to cross, while a cop directed traffic.
Finally, the cop blew his whistle, motioned to the crowd, and shouted, "Okay, pedestrians!" The throng surged across
Broadway -- all except the blonde, who stayed on the corner.
When the walkers were safely on the other side of the street, the cop moved the cross-traffic through the intersection. Half a minute later, he stopped the cars on Broadway and sent
the 72nd Street traffic into motion.
Again, he got around to the blonde's corner, where by this time she had again been joined by a crowd of people.
Tweeeeeeeet! "Okay, pedestrians!"
The crowd crossed the street, but again the blonde stayed put. She looked at her watch and tapped her foot but never budged from the sidewalk.
Finally, after the cop yelled "Okay, pedestrians!" for the third more...

Two old men meet on a street corner. The first old man said, "Where have you been for the last couple of months?"
The second old man replied, "I was in jail."
The firsst old man asked, "You were in jail? Why were you in jail?"
He replied, "Well, about two months ago I was standing on a corner, and this beautiful young woman rushes up with a policeman, points to me and says, 'He is the man, officer, he is the one who attacked and raped me'."
The first old man said, "What? And you let her get away with it?"
Second old replied, "Well, I'll tell you, I felt so flattered, I admitted to it."