Darts Jokes / Recent Jokes

A very drunk man goes into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender serves him and asks him if he would like to try the bar game of darts. Three in the bullseye and win a prize.. Only a dollar for three darts.
The drunk agrees and throws the first dart. A bullseye! Downs another drink, takes aim on wobbly feet, lets go...Two bulls eyes!!! Two more quick drinks go down. Barely able to stand, he lets go with the last dart.
Three bulls eyes!!!
All are astounded. No one has ever won. The bartender searches for a prize... grabs a turtle from the bar's terrarium and presents it to the drunk as his prize.
Three weeks pass... The drunk returns and orders more drinks, then announces he would like to try the dart game again. To the total amazement and wonderment of all the local drunks, he scores three more bulls eyes and demands his prize.
The bartender, being a sort of drunk himself, and a bit short of memory, doesn't know what to give, and he asks the drunk " Say, more...

Doris and Fred had started their retirement years and decided to raise some extra cash by advertising for a tenant for their terrace house. After a few days, a young attractive woman applied for the room and explained that she was a model working in a
nearby city center studio for a few weeks and that she would like the room from Mondays to Thursdays, but would pay for the whole week.
Doris showed her the house and they agreed to start straight away. "There's just one problem," explained the model. "Because of my job, I have to take a bath every night, and I notice you don't have a bath."
"That's not a problem," replied Doris. "We have a tin
bath out in the yard and we bring it in to the living room in front of the fire and fill it with hot water."
"What about your husband?" asked the model.
"Oh, he plays darts most weekdays, so he will be out in the evenings," replied Doris.
"Good," said more...

A very drunk man goes into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender serves him and asks him if he would like to try the bar game of darts. Three in the bullseye and win a prize.. Only a dollar for three darts.
The drunk agrees and throws the first dart. A bullseye! He downs another drink, takes aim on wobbly feet, lets go...Two bulls eyes!!! Two more quick drinks go down. Barely able to stand, he lets go of the last dart.
Three bulls eyes!!!
All are astounded. No one has ever won before. The bartender searches for a prize... grabs a turtle from the bar's terrarium and presents it to the drunk as his prize.
Three weeks pass... The drunk returns and orders more drinks, then announces he would like to try the dart game again. To the total amazement and wonderment of all the local drunks, he scores three more bulls eyes and demands his prize.
The bartender, being a sort of drunk himself, and a bit short of memory, doesn't know what to give, so he asks the drunk, more...

Doris and Fred had started their retirement years and decided to raise some extra cash by advertising for a lodger in their terrace house.
After a few days, a young attractive woman applied for the room and explained that she was a model working in a near-by city center studio for a few weeks and that she would like the room from Mondays to Thursdays, but would pay for the whole week. Doris showed her the house and they agreed to start straight away.
"There's just one problem," explained the model. "Because of my job, I have to have a bath every night, and I notice you don't have a bath."
"That's not a problem," replied Doris. "We have a tin bath out in the yard and we bring it into the living room in front of the fire and fill it with hot water."
"What about your husband? asked the model. "Oh, he plays darts most weekdays, so he will be out in the evenings," replied Doris.
"Good," said the more...

A drunk goes into a bar. He is very, very drunk - can hardly stand up. He slurs his way up to the bar and says:
"Hey, bartender! Gimme a martini!"
"No, no," says the bartender. "You've had too much already."
The drunk spies a dart board behind the bar.
"Tell you what," he says. "If I can throw three bull's eyes with that dart set would you let me have the drink?"
"Sure," says the bartender, thinking the guy would leave after the little game. He hands the drunk three darts. "Look out, everybody!"
Zot, zot, zot. The drunk throws three quick bull's eyes.
Well, the bartender had never seen anything like that before, but he has to make good on the wager, so he makes a martini and sets it before the drunk. He then puts a napkin next to the drink and sets a turtle on it.
"What's this," says the drunk.
"That's a prize for such fine dart throwing," says the more...