Dough Jokes / Recent Jokes
It is with the saddest heart that I must pass on the following news.
Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, Little Debbie, and Captain Crunch.
The gravesite was piled high with flours.
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very "smart" cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still, as a crusty old man, was considered a roll model for more...
Yo mama so ugly when she joined an ugly contest, they said "Sorry, no professionals."
Yo mama so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.
Yo mama so ugly just after she was born, her mother said "What a treasure!" and her father said "Yes, let's go bury it."
Yo mama so ugly they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies.
Yo mama so ugly they filmed "Gorillas in the Mist" in her shower
Yo mama so ugly they didn't give her a costume when she tried out for Star Wars.
Yo mama so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around her ankle, they put it around her neck
Yo mama so ugly she gets 364 extra days to dress up for Halloween.
Yo mama so ugly when she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillence cameras
Yo mama so ugly her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her
Yo mama so ugly her mom had to tie a steak more...
A lady named Linda went to Arkansas last week to visit her in-laws, and while there, went to a store.
She parked next to a car with a woman sitting in it, her eyes closed and hands behind her head,
apparently sleeping. When Linda came out a while later, she again saw the woman, her hands still
behind her head but with her eyes open. The woman looked very strange, so Linda tapped on the window
and said "Are you okay?"
The woman answered "I've been shot in the head, and I am holding my brains in."
Linda didn't know what to do, so she ran into the store, where store officials called the paramedics.
They had to break into the car because the door was locked. When they got in, they found that the
woman had bread dough on the back of her head and in her hands.
A Pilsbury biscuit canister had exploded, apparently from the heat in the car, making a loud
explosion like that of a gunshot, and hit her in the head. When she more...
Pillsbury Dough Boy wanted for attempted murderA lady named Linda went to Arkansas last week to visit her in-laws, and while there, went to a store. She parked next to a car with a womansitting in it, her eyes closed and hands behind her head, apparentlysleeping. When Linda came out a while later, she again saw the woman, her hands still behind her head but with her eyes open. The woman looked very strange, so Linda tapped on the window and said,"Are you okay?" The woman answered, "I've been shot in the head, and Iam holding my brains in." Linda didn't know what to do, so she ran into the store, where storeworkers called the paramedics. They had to break into the car becausethe door was locked. When they got in, they found that the woman hadbread dough on the back of her head and in her hands. A Pillsbury biscuit cannister had exploded, apparently from the heatin the car, making a loud explosion like that of a gunshot, and hit herin the head. When she reached back more...
One day a blond is getting back from the stor and as she pulls into the drive way she heres aload BANG! and fells somthing hit her head she reach's back and feels somthing soft and mushey in alarm she grabs here head thinking that she had been shot and that that was her brain. as somone gos by they notice her yelling for an ambulance so the man runs and calls an ambulance. when the paramedecs pry her hands from her head they find her cluthching a pice of dough!
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Pillsbury Dough Boy wanted for attempted murderA lady named Linda went to Arkansas last week to visit her in-laws, and while there, went to a store. She parked next to a car with a womansitting in it, her eyes closed and hands behind her head, apparentlysleeping. When Linda came out a while later, she again saw the woman, her hands still behind her head but with her eyes open.The woman looked very strange, so Linda tapped on the window and said,"Are you okay?" The woman answered, "I've been shot in the head, and Iam holding my brains in."Linda didn't know what to do, so she ran into the store, where storeworkers called the paramedics. They had to break into the car becausethe door was locked. When they got in, they found that the woman hadbread dough on the back of her head and in her hands.A Pillsbury biscuit cannister had exploded, apparently from the heatin the car, making a loud explosion like that of a gunshot, and hit herin the head. When she reached back to more...