Ease Jokes / Recent Jokes
A guy who was in the Air Force had just spent a year tour unaccompanied to Alaska.
The first night he got home, he exclaimed to his wife, "Honey, I want you to know that I haven't wasted all this time alone. Instead, I've mastered the art of mind over matter. Just watch this!"
And with that he dropped his trousers and shorts and stood before her in his altogether.
"Now watch," he said. Next he said, "Dick, ten-HUT!" And with that, his dick sprang to full erection. Then he said, "Dick, at EASE!" And his dick deflated again.
"Wow, that was amazing," said his wife. "Do you mind if I bring our next-door neighbor over to see this? It's really something else!"
The guy responded that he didn't mind at all, since he was proud of what he had accomplished.
So the wife goes next door and comes back with a delicious looking woman who got this guy's full attention! After a more...
Computer Ease! The following are new Windows messages that are under consideration for the planned Windows 2000: 1. Smash forehead on keyboard to continue. 2. Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue. 3. Press any key to continue or any other key to quit. 4. Press any key except. .. no, No, NO, NOT THAT ONE! 5. Press Ctrl-Alt-Del now for IQ test. 6. Close your eyes and press escape three times. 7. Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner. 8. This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game? 9. Windows message: "Error saving file! Format drive now? (Y/Y)" 10. This is a message from God Gates: "Rebooting the world. Please log off." 11. To "shut down" your system, type "WIN." 12. BREAKFAST. SYS halted... Cereal port not responding. 13. COFFEE. SYS missing... Insert cup in cup holder and press any key. 14. CONGRESS. SYS corrupted... Reboot Washington D. C? (Y/N) 15. File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N) 16. Bad or more...
Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem? A: Carry loaded weapons.
A guy who was in the Air Force had just spent a year tour unaccompanied to Alaska.
The first night he got home, he exclaimed to his wife, “Honey, I want you to know that I haven’t wasted all this time alone. Instead, I’ve mastered the art of mind over matter. Just watch this! ”
And with that he dropped his trousers and shorts and stood before her in his altogether.
“Now watch, ” he said. Next he said, “Dick, ten-HUT! ” And with that, his dick sprang to full erection. Then he said, “Dick, at EASE! ”
And his dick deflated again.
“Wow, that was amazing, ” said his wife. “Do you mind if I bring our next-door neighbor over to see this? It’s really something else! ”
The guy responded that he didn’t mind at all, since he was proud of what he had accomplished.
So the wife goes next door and comes back with a delicious looking woman who got this guy’s full attention! After a brief pause to take her in, he said, “Now watch more...
A young Army man who just completed a year tour in Alaska, unaccompanied, had finally returned home.
The first night he was home, he excitedly said to his wife, "Honey, I want you to know that I didn't waste all the time I spent alone. Instead, I mastered the art of mind over matter. Just watch this!"
He then dropped his trousers and shorts and stood before her.
"Now, watch closely," he said to his wife. Next he said, "Dick, ten-HUT!" With that, his dick sprang to full erection. He then said, "Dick, at EASE!" Immediately, his dick deflated.
"That's amazing!" exclaimed his wife. "Is it all right if I bring our next-door neighbor over to see this? This is really incredible!"
Being so proud of what he had accomplished, he told his wife he didn't mind at all.
She quickly went next door and returned with a gorgeous looking woman who immediately got his full attention. After a short pause to 'compose' more...
A guy who was in the Air Force had just spent a year tour unaccompanied to Alaska. The first night he got home, he exclaimed to his wife, "Honey, I want you to know that I haven't wasted all this time alone. Instead, I've mastered the art of mind over matter. Just watch this!"And with that he dropped his trousers and shorts and stood before her in his altogether." Now watch," he said. Next he said, "Dick, ten-HUT!" And with that, his dick sprang to full erection. Then he said, "Dick, at EASE!" And his dick deflated again." Wow, that was amazing," said his wife. "Do you mind if I bring our next-door neighbor over to see this? It's really something else!"The guy responded that he didn't mind at all, since he was proud of what he had accomplished. So the wife goes next door and comes back with a delicious looking woman who got this guy's full attention! After a brief pause to take her in, he said, "Now watch this." more...
Computer Ease! The following are new Windows messages that are under consideration for the planned Windows 2000: 1. Smash forehead on keyboard to continue. 2. Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue. 3. Press any key to continue or any other key to quit. 4. Press any key except... no, No, NO, NOT THAT ONE! 5. Press Ctrl-Alt-Del now for IQ test. 6. Close your eyes and press escape three times. 7. Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner. 8. This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play another game? 9. Windows message: "Error saving file! Format drive now? (Y/Y)" 10. This is a message from God Gates: "Rebooting the world. Please log off." 11. To "shut down" your system, type "WIN." 12. BREAKFAST.SYS halted... Cereal port not responding. 13. COFFEE.SYS missing... Insert cup in cup holder and press any key. 14. CONGRESS.SYS corrupted... Reboot Washington D. C? (Y/N) 15. File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N) 16. Bad or more...