Eaters Jokes

THE DANGER OF EATING BREAD

A recent newspaper headline read,' 'Smell of baked bread may be health hazard.'' The article went on to describe the dangers of the smell of baking bread. The main danger, apparently, is that the organic components of this aroma may break down ozone.

I was horrified. When are we going to do something about bread-induced global warming? Sure, we attack tobacco companies, but when is the government going to go after Big Bread? Well, I've done a little research, and what I've discovered should make anyone think twice....

THE FINDINGS

1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread eaters.

2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.

3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in more...

What do some burger eaters have? A Hardee appetite!

Part 1 (Introduction) - (Original Author: nobody@hangout. rutgers. edu)
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Back in the good old days - the "Golden Era" of computers, it was easy to separate the men from boys
(sometimes called "Real Men" and "Quiche Eaters" in the literature). During this period, the Real Men were
the ones that understood the computer programming, and the Quiche Eaters were the ones that didn't. A
real computer programmer said things like "DO 10 I=1, 10" and "ABEND" (they actually talked in capital
letters, you understand), and the rest of world said things like "computers are too complicated for me" and
"I can't relate to computers - they are so impersonal". (A previous work [1] points out that Real Men don't
relate to anything, and aren't afraid of being impersonal.)
But, as usual, times change. We are faced today with a world more...