Favorite Jokes / Recent Jokes
Farmer Brown decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking company (responsible for the accident) to court. In court, the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning Farmer Brown. "Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident,' I'm fine'?" asked the lawyer.
Farmer Brown responded, "Well I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the..."
"I didn't ask for any details," the lawyer interrupted, "just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident,' I'm fine'!"
Farmer Brown said, "Well I had just gotten Bessie into the trailer and I was driving down the road..."
The lawyer interrupted again and said, "Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to more...
Stages of LifeTHE MALE STAGES OF LIFEAGE DRINK 17 beer 25 bourbon 35 vodka 48 double vodka 66 MaaloxAGE SEDUCTION LINE 17 My parents are away for the weekend. 25 My girlfriend is away for the weekend. 35 My fiancee is away for the weekend. 48 My wife is away for the weekend. 66 My second wife is dead. AGE FAVORITE SPORT 17 sex 25 sex 35 sex 48 sex 66 nappingAGE DEFINITION OF A SUCCESSFUL DATE 17 "tongue" 25 "breakfast" 35 "She didn't set back my therapy." 48 "I didn't have to meet her kids." 66 "Got home alive." AGE FAVORITE FANTASY 17 getting to third 25 airplane sex 35 menage a trois 48 taking the company public 66 Swiss maid/Nazi love slaveAGE WHAT'S THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED? 17 25 25 35 35 48 48 66 66 17AGE IDEAL DATE 17 Triple Stephen King feature at a drive-in 25 "Split the check before we go back to my place" 35 "Just come over." 48 "Just come over and cook." 66 Sex in the company jet on the way more...
There was an elderly man at home, upstairs, dying in bed.
He smelled the aroma of his favorite chocolate chip cookies baking. He
wanted one last cookie before he died. He fell out of bed, crawled to
the
landing, rolled down the stairs and crawled into the kitchen where his
wife
was busily baking cookies.
With his last remaining strength he crawled to the table and was just
barely
able to lift his withered arm to the cookie sheet. As he grasped a
warm,
moist chocolate chip cookie, his favorite kind, his wife suddenly
whacked
his hand with a spatula.
Gasping for breath, he asked her, "Why did you do that?"
"Those are for the funeral."
What is the pigs favorite musical instrument? The piggalo (piccalo).
: How do you hire a teddy bear? A: Put him on stilts! Q: What do you call a big white bear with a hole in his middle? A: A polo bear! Q: Why do polo bears like bald men? A: Because they have a great, white, bear place! Q: What do polo bears have for lunch? A: Ice burger! Q: What's a teddy bears favorite pasta? A: Tagliateddy! Q: What do Alexander the Great and Winnie the Pooh have in common? A: They both have' the' as their middle names! Q: Why is polar bear cheap to have as a pet? A: It lives on ice! Q: Why shouldn't you take a bear to the zoo? A: Because they'd rather go to the cinema! Q: What is a bear's favorite drink? A: Koka-Koala! Q: Why was the little bear so spoiled? A: Because its mother panda'd to its every whim!
What's Michael Jackson's favorite hobby? Blowing bubbles.