Freeway Jokes / Recent Jokes

This truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers stops to eat at diner. As he approaches the door, he sees a big sign on the door saying,
"NERDS NOT ALLOWED - ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!" He goes on in and sits down. The waiter comes over to him, sniffs, and says, "You smell kind of nerdy. What do you do for a living?" The truck driver says he drives a truck, and that the smell is just from the computers he's hauling. The waiter says, "OK, truck drivers aren't nerds," and takes his order.As he is eating, a skinny guy walks in with tape on his glasses, a pocket protector with twelve kinds of pens and pencils, and a belt at least a foot too long. The waiter, without saying a word, pulls out a shotgun and blows the nerdy guy away. Stunned, the truck driver asks him why he did that.The waiter said, "Not to worry. The nerds are overpopulating the Silicon Valley, and are in season now. "You don't even need a license," he said.So the more...

A truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers stops for a beer. Approaching the bar, he sees a big sign on the door saying "NERDS NOT ALLOWED - ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!"
He goes in and sits down. The bartender comes over to him, sniffs, says he smells kind of nerdy, asks him what he does for a living.
The truck driver says he drives a truck, and the smell is just from the computers he is hauling.
The bartender says OK, truck drivers are not nerds, and serves him a beer.
Sipping his beer, the truck driver watches as a skinny guy walks in complete with tape around his glasses, a pocket protector with twelve kinds of pens and pencils, and a belt at least a foot too long. The bartender, without saying a word, pulls out a shotgun and blows the guy away.
The truck driver asks him why he did that. The bartender said not to worry, the nerds are overpopulating the Silicon Valley, and are in season now.
"You don't even need a license," he more...

A truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers stops for a beer. As he approaches the bar he sees a big sign on the door saying
"NERDS NOT ALLOWED-ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!"
He goes in and sits down. The bartender comes over to him, sniffs, says he smells kind of nerdy, asks him what he does for a living.
The truck driver says he drives a truck, and the smell is just from the computers he is hauling.
The bartender says OK, truck drivers are not nerds, and serves him a beer. As he is sipping his beer, a skinny guy walks in with tape around his glasses, a pocket protector with twelve kinds of pens and pencils, and a belt at least a foot too long.
The bartender, without saying a word, pulls out a shotgun and blows the guy away.
The truck driver asks him why he did that. The bartender said not to worry, the nerds are over-populating the Silicon Valley, and are in season now. You don't even need a license, he said.
So the truck driver more...

We do not advise following any of the below driving rules to any extent. Driving should be taken seriously at all times. The below jokes are simply here for entertainment purposes.

When using a metered entrance ramp, vehicles in the carpool lane do not need to stop. Similarly, vehicles NOT in the diamond lane also do not need to stop.

If, at any time, you have witnessed a green light, it is okay to proceed through the intersection, regardless of the current color of the light.

The shoulder becomes a lane if you are driving a Porsche.

If you paid more than $60, 000 for your car, you automatically have the right of way, regardless of the situation. This is especially applicable in parking lots.

Drive as quickly as possible through parking structures. Pass any open spot by at least four car lengths before backing up to claim it. Disregard the angry mob that has formed behind you.

Get to know your horn. Use it as often as more...