Freshmen Jokes

Freshmen: Are never in bed past noon. Seniors: Are never out of bed before noon. Freshmen: Read the syllabus to find out what classes they can cut. Seniors: Read the syllabus to find out what classes they need to attend. Freshmen: Brings a can of soda into a lecture hall. Seniors: Brings a jumbo hoagie and six-pack of Mtn. Dew into a recitation class. Freshmen: Calls the professor "Professor." Seniors: Calls the professor "Bob." Freshmen: Would walk ten miles to get to class. Seniors: Drives to class if it's further than three blocks away. Freshmen: Memorizes the course material to get a good grade. Seniors: Memorizes the professor's habits to get a good grade. Freshmen: Knows a book-full of useless trivia about the university. Seniors: Knows where the next class is. Maybe... Freshmen: Shows up at a morning exam clean, perky, and fed. Seniors: Shows up at a morning exam in sweats with a cap on and a box of pop tarts in hand. Freshmen: Have to ask where the computer more...

#10. A musical instrument.
# 9. A floatation device.
# 8. Something flute players can't keep their hands off.
# 7. A mirror.
# 6. Punishment. (freshmen + Kieth carry heavy tubas all year)
# 5. A battering ram
# 4. A chair.
# 3. Babe Magnet
# 2. Trash Can (freshmen + Kieth's tubas)
# 1. Storage Container for music, field show charts, soda, food, tools, towels, and koosh balls!!

While a friend and I were visiting Annapolis, we noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand. "What are they doing?" I asked our tour guide.

"Each year," he replied with a grin, "The upperclassmen ask the freshmen how many bricks it took to finish paving this courtyard."

"So what's the answer?" my friend asked him when we were out of earshot of the freshmen.

The guide replied, "One."

Found it on soc.culture.sri-lanka...
The dean of Engineering had once walked into a class, and said
"Good Morning." The whole class chorused "Good Morning."
"Hi, you are freshmen aren't you?" he asked.
One student bolder than the others asked him how he knew.
"Well," he said. "When I say 'Good Morning' to a class, if they are
freshmen they say 'Good Morning' too. If they are sophomores, they
quietly fold their papers away, and look at me. A class of Juniors
will look at me over the top of their papers, and then get back to
them. A class of Seniors will ignore my greeting, and keep reading
the papers. When I say 'Good Morning' to a class of graduate students,
they write it down."

When I first started college, the Dean came in and said "Good Morning" to all of us. When we echoed back to him, he responded "Ah, you're Freshmen."
He explained. "When you walk in and say good morning, and they say good morning back, it's Freshmen.
When they put their newspapers down and open their books, it's Sophomores.
When they look up so they can see the instructor over the tops of the newspapers, it's juniors.
When they put their feet up on the desks and keep reading, it's seniors."
"When you walk in and say good morning, and they write it down, it's graduate students."