Gerald Jokes

"Things are more like they are now than they have ever been." -President Gerald Ford
"My fellow astronauts..."
-Vice-President Dan Quayle, beginning a speech at an Apollo 11 anniversary celebration.
"Capital punishment is our society's recognition of the sanctity of human life."
-Orrin Hatch, Senator from Utah, explaining his support of the death penalty.
"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."
-Charles de Gaulle, ex-French President
"I stand by all the misstatements."
-Dan Quayle, defending himself against criticism for making verbal gaffes
"Gerald Ford was a Communist"
-Ronald Reagan in a speech. He later indicated he meant to say 'Congressman'.
"Outside of the killings, Washington D.C. has one of the lowest crime rates in the country."
-Mayor Marion Barry, Washington D.C.
"We found the term 'killing' too broad."
-State Department more...

Knock Knock!
Who's there?
Gerald.
Gerald who?
Gerald washed up! Knock Knock
Who's there!
Gerald!
Gerald who!
Gerald friend again!

There was a young lady named Gloria
who'd been had by Sir Gerald Di Maurier,
and then by six men,
Sir Gerald again,
and the band at the Waldorf-Astoria.
Lyle's Joke Boutique.

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Gerald!
Gerald who!
Gerald washed up kid!

Gerald: "Have you ever come across a man who, at the slightest touch, caused you to thrill and tremble in every fiber of your being?" Mabel: "Yes, the dentist."