Illegal Jokes / Recent Jokes

In Oblong, Illinois, it's punishable by law to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day.
No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth.
Warn your hubby that after lovemaking in Ames, Iowa, he isn't allowed to take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with you - or holding you in his arms.
Bozeman, Montana, has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown - if they're nude.(Apparently, if you wear socks, you're safe from the law!)
In hotels in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, every room is required to have twin beds. And the beds must always be a minimum of two feet apart when a couple rents a room for only one night. And it's illegal to make love on the floor between the beds!
The owner of every hotel in Hastings, Nebraska, is more...

One man may not back into a parking spot becasue it prevents police officers from seeing the license plate. Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March. All males 18 to 50 years old must work six days a year on public roads. Mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans. Hotel sheets must be exactly 99 inches long and 81 inches wide. State government officials who engage in private duels can be dismissed from their post. Drinking from your own bottle in a bar can lead to your arrest. A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17. It is illegal to sell cars on Sunday. Drinks on the house are illegal. It is illegal for a liquor store to sell cold soft drinks. A person who dyes, stains, or otherwise alters the natural coloring of a bird or rabbit commits a Class B misdemeanor. (Ind. Code 15-2.1-21-13(b) Smoking in the state more...

In Oblong, Illinois, it's punishable by law to make love while hunting or fishing on your wedding day.No man is allowed to make love to his wife with the smell of garlic, onions, or sardines on his breath in Alexandria, Minnesota. If his wife so requests, law mandates that he must brush his teeth.Warn your hubby that after lovemaking in Ames, Iowa, he isn't allowed to take more than three gulps of beer while lying in bed with you - or holding you in his arms.Bozeman, Montana, has a law that bans all sexual activity between members of the opposite sex in the front yard of a home after sundown - if they're nude.(Apparently, if you wear socks, you're safe from the law!)In hotels in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, every room is required to have twin beds. And the beds must always be a minimum of two feet apart when a couple rents a room for only one night. And it's illegal to make love on the floor between the beds! The owner of every hotel in Hastings, Nebraska, is required to provide each more...

It is illegal to stab yourself to gain someone's pity.It's against the law for a man to seduce "a chaste woman by means of temptation, deception, arts, flattery or a promise of marriage."It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile.It is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle. It is illegal to wear a fake mustache that causes laughter in church. Putting salt on a railroad track may be punishable by death. It is legal to drive the wrong way down a one-way street if you have a lantern attached to the front of your automobile. Men may not spit in front of the opposite sex.Boogers may not be flicked into the wind. You may not have an ice cream cone in your back pocket at any time. Masks may not be worn in publicIt is illegal for a driver to be blindfolded while operating a vehicle.It's illegal to play dominoes on Sunday.Bear wrestling matches are prohibited.You may not drive more...

A man can legally beat his wife, but not more than once a month.It's illegal to mispronounce the name of the state of Arkansas. Arkansas must be pronounced "Arkansaw" Oral sex is considered to be sodomy. Alligators may not be kept in bathtubs.The Arkansas legislature passed a law that states that the Arkansas River can rise no higher than to the Main Street bridge in Little Rock. A law provides that school teachers who bob their hair will not get a raise. A voter is only allowed five minutes to mark his ballot. Flirtation between the members of the opposite sex on the streets of Little Rock may result in a 30-day jail term.At Arkansas State University two people cannot hold hands while standing in a doorway unless they belong to a union. In Arkansas it is illegal to buy or sell blue lightbulbs.An Arkansas legislator not long ago proposed that the state provide growth hormones to dwarfs. Fayetteville: It is illegal to kill "any living creature". Little Rock: Dogs more...

Poll shows most adults on prescription drugs. As a result, the "Drug Free Workplace" policy has been amended to the "Illegal Drugs Free Workplace" policy.
Since the word document has a grammar check, the title was automatically changed to the "Illegal Drugs Are Free Workplace" policy.
Remember, Vote for Gary and get a ManFree

It is illegal to ride a horse while under the influence.It is illegal for liquor stores to sell food or grocery stores to sell any alcohol except beer that is at most 3.2% alcohol.

It is illegal for a woman wearing a red dress to be out on the streets after 7 PM.Colorado law requires that wine be sold in containers of at least 24 ounces and spirits in containers at least a fifth of a gallon. But, at the same time, it also decrees that no alcohol beverage can be stored in hotel minibars in anything larger than miniature containers. Colorado Springs: It is permissible to wear a holstered six-gun within city limits, except on Sunday, Election Day, or holidays. Crippe Creek: It is illegal to bring your horse or pack mule above the ground floor of any building. Denver: The dog catcher must notify dogs of impounding by posting, for three consecutive days, a notice on a tree in the city park and along a public road running through said park.Denver: It is unlawful to lend your more...