Lead Jokes / Recent Jokes
Q: How many lead trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Fifty. One to do it and the others to stand around and say, "I could do that better.
Q: What do lead trumpet players use for birth control?
A: Their personality.
Q: What is the difference between a trumpet soloist and King Kong?
A: King Kong is more sensitive.
Q: What`s the difference between trumpet players and government bonds?
A: Government bonds eventually mature and earn money.
The best recording of the Haydn Trumpet Concerto is Music Minus One.
Q: How to trumpet players traditionally greet each other?
A: "Hi. I`m better than you."
Q: How do you know when a trumpet player is at your door?
A: The doorbell shrieks!
The FDA is considering putting additional warnings on beer and alcohol such as:
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an asshole.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at 4 in morning.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your pants.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember)
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Chuck.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.
Lead me not into temptation -- I can find the way myself.
If you can lead it to water and force it to drink, it isn't a horse.
How many lead guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
None... they just steal somebody else's light
Jerry Falwell is our hero, He’s the one to lead the fight. He has seen the truth and spoken out, He’ll lead us further right, Where we will join the multitude Who just ain’t none too bright. Moron Morality.