Ride Jokes / Recent Jokes

The young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. The ride completed, she seemed rather bored.
"What would you like to do next?" he asked. "I wanna be weighed," she said. So the young man took her over to the weight guesser.
"One-twelve," said the man at the scale, and he was absolutely right.
Next they rode the roller coaster. After that, he bought her some popcorn and cotton candy, then he asked what else she would like to do.
"I wanna be weighed," she said. I really latched onto a square one tonight, thought the young man, and using the excuse he had developed a headache, he took the girl home.
The girl's mother was surprised to see her home so early, and asked, "What's wrong, dear, didn't you have a nice time tonight?"
"Wousy," said the girl.

The young playboy took a blind date to an amusement park. They went for a ride on the Ferris wheel. The ride completed, she seemed rather bored."What would you like to do next?" he asked. "I wanna be weighed," she said. So the young man took her over to the weight guesser."One-twelve," said the man at the scale, and he was absolutely right.Next they rode the roller coaster. After that, he bought her some popcorn and cotton candy, then he asked what else she would like to do."I wanna be weighed," she said. I really latched onto a square one tonight, thought the young man, and using the excuse he had developed a headache, he took the girl home.The girl's mother was surprised to see her home so early, and asked, "What's wrong, dear, didn't you have a nice time tonight?""Wousy," said the girl.

It was the day after Christmas. The pastor of a church was looking over their Nativity scene when he noticed the baby Jesus was missing from among the figures.
Immediately he turned and went outside and saw a little boy with a red wagon, and in the wagon was the figure of the little infant,
Jesus.
So he walked up to the boy and said, "Well, where did you get Him, my fine friend?
The little boy replied, "I got him from the church.
"And why did you take him?"
The boy said, "Well, about a week before Christmas, I prayed to
the little Lord Jesus and I told him if he would bring me a red
wagon for Christmas, I would give him the first ride in it.

Santa rides in a sleigh. What do elves ride in?
Mini vans!

Santa Singh and Banta Singh landed up in Bombay. They managed to get into a double-decker bus. Santa Singh somehow managed to get a bottom seat, But unfortunate Banta got pushed to the top.
After a while when the rush is over, Santa went upstairs to see friend Bannta Singh. He met Banta in a bad condition clutching the seats in front with both hands, scared to death. He says, "Are Banta Singh! What the heck's goin' on? Why are you so scared? I was enjoying my ride down there? Scared Banta replies. "Yeah, but you've got a driver."

Well, it's getting to be summer camp time, here in the good ol' USA, and one of the legendary requirements is the eternal "letter home." Here's an example provided me by a dear friend, trinette.
Dear Mom and Dad,
Our scoutmaster told us to write to our parents in case you saw the flood on TV and were worried. We are OK. Only one of our tents and two sleeping bags got washed away. Luckily, none of us got drowned because we were all up the mountain looking for Chad when it happened. Oh yes, please call Chad's mother and tell her he is OK. He can't write because of the cast. I got to ride in one of the search and rescue jeeps. It was neat. We never would have found him in the dark if it wasn't for the lightning.
Scoutmaster Walt got mad at Chad for going on a hike alone without telling anyone. Chad said he did tell him, but it was during the fire so he probably didn't hear him. Did you know that if you put gas on a fire, the gas can will blowup? The wet wood didn't more...

1. Mountain bikes don't screw around.
2. Mountain bikes don't care if it's that time of the month.
3. Mountain bikes don't have parents.
4. Mountain bikes don't whine unless something is really wrong.
5. Mountain bikes don't care about professional sports.
6. You can share your mountain bike with your friends.
7. Mountain bikes don't care how many other mountain bikes you've ridden.
8. When riding, you and your mountain bike can arrive at the same
time.
9. Mountain bikes don't care if other mountain bikes look at
you.
10. Mountain bikes don't care if you look at other mountain
bikes.
11. If your mountain bike goes flat you can fix it.
12. If your mountain bike is too short you can heighten it.
13. If your mountain bike is misaligned, you don't have
to discuss politics with it.
14. You can have a black & white mountain bike and bring it home
to your parents.
15. You don't have to be jealous of other women who more...