Rule Jokes / Recent Jokes
The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.
A big city lawyer was out duck hunting in rural Arizona. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell on the other side of a fence into a farmer's field. Just as the lawyer climbed over the fence, an old farmer drove up on his tractor and asked the lawyer what he thought he was doing.
"The duck I shot fell into this field, so I'm going to retrieve it," replied the lawyer.
"Listen, mister, this is my property and you're not coming over here," snarled the old farmer.
"Look, old man, I happen to be one of the best trial attorneys in the country, and either you let me get that duck or I'll sue you and take everything you own," demanded the lawyer.
"Looks like you don't know how we do things in these parts," said the farmer. "Around here we settle little disagreements like this with the Three Kick Rule."
"What's the Three Kick Rule?" asked the lawyer.
"Well, first I kick you three times, then you kick me more...
Fishing rule #1: The least experienced fisherman always catches the biggest fish.
Fishing rule #2: The worse your line is tangled, the better is the fishing around you.
Fishing rule #3: Fishing will do a lot for a man but it won't make him truthful.
Franklin's Rule: Blessed is the end user who expects nothing, for he/she will not be disappointed.
Golden Rule Of Arts And Sciences: Whoever has the gold makes the rules.
Thistles may not grow in one's yard. A woman may not go through her husband's pockets while he is sleeping.Annapolis: It's illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits. Baltimore: You cannot swear while inside the city limits. Baltimore: It is illegal to mistreat oysters. Baltimore: It is illegal to wash or scrub sinks no matter how dirty they get.Baltimore: It's illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits. Baltimore: It's illegal to take a lion to the movies. Baltimore: It is a park rule violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine. This would include joggers that go shirtless. (1898) -Park Rule 6 Baltimore: It is a violation of city code to sell chicks or ducklings to a minor within 1 week of the Easter holiday. Baltimore City: Though you may spit on a city roadway, spitting on city sidewalks is prohibited. Baltimore City: You may not curse inside the city limits. Columbia: You can not have more...
Rule Of Accuracy: When working toward the solution of a problem it always helps you to know the answer.