Scientology Jokes

Leaders of Scientology have said that Tom Cruise is the "chosen one" to spread news about the faith, and that he will be worshipped like Jesus by future generations.
Ok, but can't he take his proselytizing ass to the Middle East? That's where they could use a new religion! We already know the Jews won't listen, but perhaps the Muslims...

I walked into the Church of Scientology to watch the free movie (and for material). When I was leaving the overly friendly lady was trying to sell me the book Dianetics.
As I refused to purchase it she said, "Are you perfect? If there was one thing that you could do to improve your life, what would it be?"
and I said, "I'd stop buying things I don't need."