Sheets Jokes / Recent Jokes

Horses in the race are:
1. Passionate Lady
2. Bare Belly
3. Silk Panties
4. Conscience
5. Jockey Shorts
6. Clean Sheets
7. Smooth Thighs
8. Big Johnson
9. Heavy Bosom
10. Merry Cherry
Place your bets.
And they're off!
Conscience is left behind at the post. Jockey Shorts and Silk Panties are off in a hurry. Heavy Bosom is being pressured.
Passionate Lady is caught between Smooth Thighs and Big Johnson in a very tight spot.
At the halfway mark it's Bare Belly on top. Smooth Thighs open up and Big Johnson is pressed in. Heavy Bosom is being pushed hard against Clean Sheets. Passionate Lady and Smooth Thighs are working hard on Bare Belly Bare Belly is under terrific pressure from Big Johnson.
At the stretch Merry Cherry cracks under the strain. Big Johnson is making a final drive. Passionate Lady is coming.
At the finish it's Big Johnson giving everything he's got and
Passionate Lady taking more...

On the subject of interns examining overweight women, the symptoms of
pregnancy are often masked by obesity. The brother-in-law of a friend
told me the first part of this story; my cousin told me the second.
Both are now doctors, and both assured me that the stories are true.
In attempting to do a vaginal/cervical exam on a very overweight woman,
the intern could not make room to do his work. He finally enlisted
the aid of two orderlies who wrapped the woman's legs in sheets and
pulled them apart. Still not having enough room, the intern pushed a
chair between her legs and made his diagnosis:
"You're pregnant," he said. "But how you got that way without two
sheets and a chair is beyond me."
After making a similar comment, my cousin was informed by the
patient, "You're not the first short-dick white boy to tell me that."