Storeroom Jokes

I am a senior citizen...- I'm the life of the party... even when it lasts' till 8pm. - I'm very good at opening childproof caps with a hammer. - I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I'm going. - I'm good on a trip for at least an hour without my aspirin, antacid...- I'm the first one to find the bathroom wherever I go. - I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up. - I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a word you're saying. - I'm very good at telling stories... over and over and over and over. - I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not as bright as mine. - I'm so cared for: long-term care, eye care, private care, dental care. - I'm not grouchy, I just don't like traffic, waiting, children, politicians...- I'm positive I did housework correctly before the Internet. - I'm sure everything I can't find is in a secure place. - I'm wrinkled, saggy and lumpy, and that's just my left leg. - I'm having trouble remembering simple words more...

Life of a Senior Citizen... I'm the life of the party... even when it lasts till 8 p. m. I'm very good at opening child-proof caps with a hammer. I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I'm going. I'm good on a trip for at least an hour without my aspirin, beano, & antacid. I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up. I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a word you are saying. I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not as bright as mine. I'm so cared for: Long term care, Eye care, Private care, Dental care. . . I'm not grouchy, I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds, children, politicians. I'm sure everything I can't find is in a secure place. I'm wrinkled, saggy and bumpy and that's just my left leg. I'm realizing that aging is not for sissies. I'm anti-everything now: Anti-fat, Anti-smoke, Anti-noise, Anti-inflammatoryI'm going to reveal what goes on behind closed doors. . . Absolutely nothing! I'm sure they are making adults much more...