Story Jokes / Recent Jokes
in high school i went to five star basketball camp. a reputable college coach was teaching us how to handle the ball and he would always stress to be a bater, and he would always say to master it or be a master bater.
well, nuff said, i ran into a friend of an old girl friend about a year ago and she reminded me the time i had to sleep at my girl friends apartment when her siste came to town. we were too tired to drive me home that night so i slumbered. three girl on the floor not wearing much. to say the least, i was having anxiety about three in the moring. and exactly at six a.m. my girl friend kicked me out and forced me to walk home. it was a long and horrible walk i may add. when i got home i just jumped on the couch and the wonderfull coach williams voice just kept going thru my mind- BE A MASTER BATER!-
A man was digging in his garden, when his shovel hit a hard object buried in the earth, which revealed itself to be an old bottle sealed with a cork. The man wrenched the cork free and, to his astonishment, there was a cloud of smoke and a clap of thunder. Standing before him was a genie." As a reward for freeing me, I shall grant you three wishes," said the genie, "But understand, whatever you wish for, your most hated enemy shall receive twice over." The man's most hated enemy happened to be his next door neighbour, Jones. "Let's see. My first wish is..." He looked at his weather beaten bungalow, "... to live in a ten story luxury mansion." The genie clapped his hands and suddenly his minute shack transformed into the most beautiful house he had ever laid eyes on. He heard a cry of astonishment from next door and looked over to see Jones standing in the doorway of his new twenty story mansion." Now I want fifty of the most beautiful women more...
There are three sides to any story, my side, his side and the truth.
There is a story about a monastery in Europe perched high on a cliff several hundred feet in the air. The only way to reach the monastery was to be suspended in a basket which was pulled to the top by several monks who pulled and tugged with all their strength. Obviously the ride up the steep cliff in that basket was terrifying. One tourist got exceedingly nervous about half-way up as he noticed that the rope by which he was suspended was old and frayed. With a trembling voice he asked the monk who was riding with him in the basket how often they changed the rope. The monk thought for a moment and answered brusquely, "Whenever it breaks."
The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. Wednesday, October 21, 1992The most popular video in Sweden earlier this year was a 60-minute fireplace fire, shown from the point of ignition until it burns into cinders, and featuring a sound-track of fire-crackling wood. Price: about $35.
A little boy returned from Sunday school with a new perspective on the Christmas story. He had learned all about the Wise Men from the East who brought gifts to the Baby Jesus. He was so excited he could hardly wait to tell his parents. As soon as he arrived home, he immediately began, "I learned all about the very first Christmas in Sunday school today! There wasn't a Santa Claus way back then, so these three skinny guys on camels had to deliver all the toys! And Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer with his nose so bright wasn't there yet, so they had to have this big spotlight in the sky to find their way around!"
A 4th grade class was asked to get their parent to tell them a story with a moral. When they came back to school the next day, Ms. Jones asked them to share their stories. Little Mary was first."My mommy told me a story about farming. We own a farm where we raise chickens, and one time, we had three dozen eggs in a basket, and we put that basket in the truck, and we drove to the market. On the way, we went over a big bump, and all the eggs cracked and made a big mess.""And what was the moral?" Ms. Jones asked."Never put all your eggs in one basket." Mary chimed."Good. Now, Mark, what was your story?" Ms. Jones asked."My daddy told me a story about chicken farming too. One time, we got eight eggs from one chicken, but only seven off them hatched. The moral of my story is don't count your chickens before they hatch.""Good. Johnny, would you like to share your story?""My daddy told me a story about my Aunt Rose. She was a more...