Sucks Jokes

There were 3 men who wanted to buy toilets. So they went to the nearest store and were looking at the new designs of the toilets.
The first guy asks for a toilet that would go nice in his log cabin out in the woods. So the salesman gives him a toilet made of wood.
The second guy asks for a toilet that would be nice for an igloo. So the salesman givse him a toilet made of ice.
The third guy asked for the nicest toilet they have that would go in the National History of Canada Museums employee restroom. So the salesman gives him a singing toilet with a picture of the Canadian flag on the tank.
Well they all get what they ask for.
The next day all 3 men come back with their toilets.
The first man says, "This toilet sucks. Whenever I try to use it I get pieces of wood stuck in my butt."
The second man says, "This toilet sucks. Whenever I try to use it my butt gets frozen to the seat and I have to use a hairdryer to get my butt off."
The more...

This joke sucks.... One night, as a couple lay down for bed, the husband gently taps hiswife on the shoulder and starts rubbing her arm. The wife turns over andsays, "I'm sorry honey, I've got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and Iwant to stay fresh." The husband, rejected, turns over and tries to sleep. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again. This timehe whispers in her ear, "Do you have a dentist appointment tomorrow too?"

Life sucks, but Death swallows!

10. You've got a hole in your head.
9. Your master strangles you all the time.
8. Your head is disproportionate to the rest of your body.
7. You shrink in cold water.
6. You never get a haircut.
5. You always hang around with 2 nuts.
4. Your closest neighbor is an asshole.
3. Your best friend is a pussy.
2. Your scalp gets cut off if you're Jewish.
And the number one reason why it sucks to be a dick:
1. Everytime you get excited, you throw up.

10. Everbody likes sex and nobody likes school, except for virgins and only
because they haven't had sex yet.
9. Sex sucks, moans, licks, pumps, throbs etc..., school just sucks.
8. After sex you feel like smoking a cigarette. After school you feel like
smoking something a whole lot stronger.
7. You only get disciplined during sex if you want to.
6. Drinking drives people to sex, whereas school drives people to drink.
5. Sex releives stress, school is the cause of stress.
4. Nothing beats the "hands on" experience you get with sex.
3. After sex you feel like you have accomplished something.
2. Sex is cheaper. Even if you have to pay for a hooker, it is still cheaper
than paying thousands of dollars in tuition.
1. At least you have a choice whether or not you want to have sex. At
school your teachers screw you regardless!!!