Tequila Jokes / Recent Jokes

Seven New York City bartenders were asked if they could nail a woman's personality based on what she drinks. Though interviewed separately, they concurred on almost all counts.
The results:
Drink: Beer Personality: Causal, low-maintenance; down to earth. Your Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool.
Drink: Blender Drinks Personality: Flaky, whiny, annoying; a pain in the ass. Your Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabana boy.
Drink: Mixed Drinks Personality: Older, more refined, high maintenance, has very picky taste; knows EXACTLY what she wants. Your Approach: You won't have to approach her. If she's interested, she'll send YOU a drink............
Drink: Wine (does not include White Zinfandel) Personality: Conservative and classy; sophisticated yet giggles. Your Approach: Tell her you love to travel and spend quiet evenings with friends.
Drink: White Zinfandel Personality: Easy; thinks she is classy and sophisticated, actually, she has NO more...

a guy walks into a bar and meets up with a few friends.after a couple of shots of tequila, he stagers over to the bar and asks the barkeep for another shot of tequila and the bartender obliges, this goes on for about an hour or so.finially the man requests another, the barkeep says i gotta cut ya off youre way too intoxicated. the man assures the keeper hes just gettin started., he also replies i got a cab on the way 1 more for the road and again the keep serves up another round.the man asks the keep if he is a wagering kind of guy . the keep replies sure am! the man asks the keep to set his shot glass on the bar, which he does. staggering around and holding on to a patron he says i bet you 1,000 bucks i can piss in that there shot glass! barkeep says take three steps back and i will raise ya 500 to your 1,000, the man replies your on! he takes his steps back and gives it all he has, pissin all over the bar, a patron or two and never gets the first drop in the glass. giggling as he more...