Toothpick Jokes

You might be a redneck if you had to remove your toothpick for the wedding pictures!

What do you call a woman with a toothpick up her bum?
Olive.

One sunny afternoon, three men go for a ride on a hot air balloon over the Sahara desert. An hour into the trip, the balloon begins to lose altitude. A month later, someone finds one of the ballooners laying on the desert sand dead, naked, and holding half a toothpick. What happened to him?
Answer: As the balloon lost altitude, the men took of their clothes and threw them overboard to decrease the weight of the balloon. The balloon continued to drop so the men drew straws to see who would be forced to jump. The dead man in the desert drew the shortest one (the half toothpick).