Touching Jokes / Recent Jokes

A wish for Christmas It is around christmas time and santa is sitting in the middle of the mall in his big holiday setup.He has a line of kids lined up to sit on his lap and tell him what they want for christmas. As the line dwindles down; a little 5 year old boy comes up and sits on santas lap. Santa says to the little boy"I bet I know what you want for christmas". "I bet you want a puppy, P-U-P-P-Y"; touching the tip of the little boys nose with his finger after every letter of the word. The little boy responds"Nope". So santa again says"Then I bet you want a bike, B-I-K-E"; as he again touched the tip of the little boys nose with his finger. The little boy again said"Nope". Well santa's starting to get a little pissed off. So he thinks to himself that he'll try one more time. So he says to the little boy"I bet you want a fire engine, F-I-R-E-E-N-G-I-N-E"; once again touching the tip of the little boys nose with his finger more...

What do you call a blonde touching her toes? A brunette with bad breath

Quinton Chingme (Quit Touching Me)

Little Johnny had been waiting in a long line to sit on the department store
Santa's lap when he finally gets his turn at it and climbs up.
Santa say to little Johnny, touching the little boy on the nose with his
finger, "I'll bet you'd like a puppy for Christmas."
Johnny shakes his head, "No."
Santa touches the little Johnny's nose with his finger again, "Well, then I'll
bet you'd like a kitten for Christmas."
Johnny again shakes his head, "No..."
The department store Santa then asked, "Well then, what would you like for
Christmas, little boy?"
Johnny replies with a big grin, "I want some pussy!!!"
Santa, startled and almost speechless, stutters, "Well, I don't have any of
that!?!?"
Little Johnny, touching Saint Nick on nose, answers back smiling, "Yes you do,
because I can smell it on your finger!"

A wish for Christmas It is around christmas time and santa is sitting in the middle of the mall in his big holiday setup. He has a line of kids lined up to sit on his lap and tell him what they want for christmas. As the line dwindles down; a little 5 year old boy comes up and sits on santas lap. Santa says to the little boy"I bet I know what you want for christmas". "I bet you want a puppy, P-U-P-P-Y"; touching the tip of the little boys nose with his finger after every letter of the word. The little boy responds"Nope". So santa again says"Then I bet you want a bike, B-I-K-E"; as he again touched the tip of the little boys nose with his finger. The little boy again said"Nope". Well santa's starting to get a little pissed off. So he thinks to himself that he'll try one more time. So he says to the little boy"I bet you want a fire engine, F-I-R-E-E-N-G-I-N-E"; once again touching the tip of the little boys nose with his finger more...