Trimming Jokes

This TRUE STORY from my secretary.
Last week her mother was getting her usual "do" when her hairdresser relayed a previous-day experience:
The hairdresser (owner) was getting ready to close up her shop when a man came in and asked if she could give him a "quick cut" before she closed. She agreed, and as she was trimming the guy's hair, he put his hand under the "cape" and the cape started moving. (She became somewhat uncomfortable.)
Then, the lady got REAL concerned when the man put his OTHER hand under the cape and the cape started moving MORE; she thought she was trimming the hair of a PERVERT. She then panicked, took a hairdryer and smashed the man up-side his head, causing him to black out on the floor.
The lady hurried and called 911, police came... only to find out that the poor guy was JUST CLEANING HIS GLASSES!

A man was trimming his bushes. His neighbor (the blonde) walks out, checks her mail only to see that it's empty, and goes back inside. Five minutes later, she comes back out, checks her mail again only to see that it's still empty, and goes back in. The third time she comes out, the man asks her, "Excuse me, is there a problem?" The blonde replies, "Darn right there's a problem! My computer keeps on telling me' I've got mail'!"

A man was trimming his bushes. His neighbor (the blonde) walks out, checks her mail only to see that its empty, and goes back inside. Five minutes later, she comes back out, checks her mail again only to see that its still empty, and goes back in. The third time she comes out, the man asks her, "Excuse me, is there a problem?"The blonde replies, "Darn right theres a problem! My computer keeps on telling me Ive got mail!"