Whale Jokes / Recent Jokes
Willie the Whale and his whale girlfriend, Monica, are swimming happily through the ocean when they come upon a boat. On seeing the boat, Willie says, "Hey, I've got a great idea! Let's swim up under that boat and blow out really hard through our blowholes!"
Monica says, "Oh, I don't know..."
"Come on, it'll be fun, come on, just this once!", says Willie.
Monica agrees and they swim up under the boat and blow out, capsizing the boat and sending hapless sailors into the briny blue.
As they are swimming away, Willie says, "Wow, that was fun, wasn't it? Hey! I've got another idea! Let's swim back there and eat all the sailors!"
To which Monica, exasperated, replies, "Look, I agreed to the blow job, but I'm not swallowing any seamen."
If swimming is so good for your figure, how do you explain whales?
Three whales were swimming in the ocean,- mummy whale and two baby whales when along came a harpooning ship and harpooned mummy whale. Baby whales were quite upset and so they discussed a plan of action.
"Right" said baby whale 1, "Let's go under the harpooning ship and blow water out our spouts and tip the boat over!!!"
"Alright" said baby whale 2, so they did and all the sailors were tossed out of the boat and were left swimming around.
Baby whale 1 said to baby whale 2 "Let's eat some of these bastards", but baby whale 2 said "No! I'll do a blowjob but I'm not swallowing any seamen"
My 4 year old son came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me he'd dropped his toothbrush in the toilet.
So I fished it out and threw it in the garbage.
He stood there thinking for a moment, then ran to my bathroom and came out with my toothbrush.
He held it up and said with a charming little smile, "We better throw this one out too then,' cause it fell in the toilet a few days ago.
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother.
The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room.
When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover.
The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"
A little girl had just finished her first more...
a sole and a whale bumped into each other and the sole said "ar whale" then the whale said "ar sole"
What did the whale say to the dolphin when he pushed him??? I didn't do it on porpoise!!!