While Jokes / Recent Jokes

An old cowboy dressed to kill with cowboy shirt, hat,
jeans, spurs and chaps went to a bar and ordered a drink.
As he sat there sipping his whiskey, a young lady sat down
next to him.
After she ordered her drink she turned to the cowboy and
asked, "Are you a real cowboy?"
"Well, I have spent my whole life on the ranch herding
cows, breaking horses, mending fences... I guess I am,"
replied the cowboy.
After a short while he asked her what she was.
"I've never been on a ranch so I know I'm not a cowboy,"
said the young woman, "but I am a lesbian. I spend my whole
day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the
morning I think of women. When I eat, shower, watch TV,
everything seems to make me think of women."
A short while later she left and the cowboy ordered another
drink. A couple sat down next to him and asked, "Are you a
real more...

There was a farmer who had a brown cow and a white cow and he wanted to get them bred, so borrowed his neighbor's bull and turned it loose in the pasture. He told his son to watch and come in and tell him when the bull was finished. "Yeah daddy, yeah daddy," said the little boy. After a while the boy came into the living where his father was talking with some friends. "Say, Pop," said the boy. "Yes," replied his father. "The bull just screwed the brown cow!" There was a sudden lull in the conversation. The father said "Excuse me" and took his son outside. "Son, you mustn't use language like that in front of company. You should say' The bull "surprised" the brown cow'. Now go and watch and tell me when the bull "surprises" the white cow." The father went back inside the house. After a while the boy came in and said, "Hey, Daddy!" "Yes, son. Did the bull "surprise" the white more...

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim were having a discussion about who was the most religious." I was riding my camel in the middle of the Sahara," exclaimed the Muslim. Suddenly a fierce sandstorm appeared from nowhere. I truly thought my end had come as I lay next to my camel while we being buried deeper and deeper under the sand. But I did not lose my faith in the Almighty Allah, I prayed and prayed and suddenly, for a hundred metres all around me, the storm had stopped. Since that day I am a devout Muslim and am now learning to recite the Koran by memory." "One day while fishing," started the Christian," I was in my little dinghy in the middle of the ocean. Suddenly a fierce storm appeared from nowhere. I truly thought my end had come as my little dinghy was tossed up and down in the rough ocean. But I did not lose my faith in Jesus Christ, I prayed and prayed and suddenly, for 300 metres all around me, the storm had stopped. Since that day I am a devout more...

While away at a convention, an executive happened to meet a young woman who waspretty and intelligent. When he persuaded her to disrobe in his hotel room, hefound out she had a superb body as well. Unfortunately, the executive foundhimself unable to perform. On his first night home, the executive walked from the shower into the bedroomto find his wife covered in a rumpled bathrobe, her hair curled, her facecreamed, munching candy loudly while she pored through a movie magazine. Then, without warning, he felt the onset of a magnificent erection. Looking down at this, he snarled, "Why you ungrateful, mixed-up son of a bitch. Now I know why they call you a prick!"

Joe Smith started the day early having set his alarm clock (MADE IN JAPAN) for 6 a. m. While his coffeepot (MADE IN CHINA) was perking, he shaved with his electric razor (MADE IN HONG KONG). He put on a dress shirt (MADE IN SRI LANKA), designer jeans (MADE IN SINGAPORE) and tennis shoes (MADE IN KOREA). After cooking his breakfast in his new electric skillet (MADE IN INDIA) he sat down with his calculator (MADE IN MEXICO) to see how much he could spend today. After setting his watch (MADE IN TAIWAN) to the radio (MADE IN INDIA) he got in his car (MADE IN GERMANY) and continued his search for a good paying AMERICAN JOB. At the end of yet another discouraging and fruitless day, Joe decided to relax for a while. He put on his sandals (MADE IN BRAZIL) poured himself a glass of wine (MADE IN FRANCE) and turned on his TV (MADE IN INDONESIA), and then wondered why he can't find a good paying job in.... AMERICA.....

Little Johnny was 7 years old, and like other boys his age, rather curios. He had been hearing quite a bit about courting from other boys and he wondered what it was and how it was done. One day he took his questions to his mother, and she became flustered. Instead of explaining things to Johnny she told him to hide behind the curtains one night and watch his older sister and her boyfriend. This he did, and the following morning Johnny described everything to his mother.
Sis and her boyfriend sat and talked for awhile, then he turned off most of the lights. Then he started to kiss and hug her, I figured sis must be getting sick because her face started looking funny. He must have thought so too because he put his hand inside her blouse to feel her heart, just like the doctor would. Except he's not as good as the doctor, because he seemed to have trouble finding her heart.
He was getting sick too, because pretty soon both of them started panting and getting all out of breath. more...

The following is taken from a Florida newspaper:
A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio and his wife was in the house in the kitchen. The
man was racing the engine on the motorcycle and somehow, the motorcycle slipped into gear. The man,
still holding the handlebars, was dragged through a glass patio door and the motorcycle dumped onto
the floor inside the house.
The wife, hearing the crash, ran into the dining room, and found her husband laying on the floor, cut
and bleeding, the motorcycle laying next to him and the patio door shattered. The wife ran to the
phone and summoned an ambulance.
Because they lived on a fairly large hill, the wife went down the several flights of long steps to
the street to direct the paramedics to her husband.
After the ambulance arrived and transported the husband to the hospital, the wife uprighted the
motorcycle and pushed it outside. Seeing that gas had spilled on the floor, the wife more...