Wrestler Jokes / Recent Jokes

A few years ago at the World Amateur Wrestling Championship, there was a pairing of an experienced and undefeated Russian heavyweight wrestler going up against an inexperienced, upstart American heavyweight.
The main reason for the Russian wrestler's success was a hideous hold he had developed called the 'pretzel hold'. He had pinned every wrestler he had faced using this hold. It was called the 'Pretzel hold' because when the hold was applied, his opponent's body would resemble the shape of a pretzel. Once applied, no wrestler had ever been able to escape the hold.
When the match between the Russian and the American began, it was evident that the American had superior quickness, but the Russian was stronger and was just laying in wait for the American to make a mistake so he could apply the pretzel hold. Sure enough, that opportunity soon came to play and the Russian grabbed the American and applied the hold. The crowd groaned and the American wrestler's trainers had to look more...

So it seemed that Professional Wrestling had so much public image problems, and in this age of
political correctness, something had to be done to repair that image. Thus came the idea of a
Sensitivity Training Camp for Professional Wrestlers, deep in Smokey Mountains woods, far from any
human beings. After several hours, of driving on tough roads, the group had to continue the trip, on
foot for another day or so while mules carried the food and equipments for the group.
Two weeks later the Professional Wrestling Federation, invited reporters to interview the wrestlers
who were coming back from the camp. So, this reporter showed up and waited for the wrestlers who were
coming down the mountain.
He meets the Raging Bull, a 400 pound wrestler known for his vicious Death Chop. The reporter asked
him about the memorable events of the camp. After a bit of thought, the Raging Bull says, "Well,
there was this time a mule got lost, so me more...

Our story begins at the Olympics, specifically the wrestling event. It is narrowed down to the Russian or the American for the gold medal. Before the final match, the American wrestler's trainer comes to him and says, ''Now don't forget all the research we've done on this Russian. He's never lost a match because of this ''pretzel'' hold he has. Whatever you do, don't let him get you in this hold! If he does, you're finished!''
The wrestler nods in agreement.
Now, to the match: The American and the Russian circle each other several times looking for an opening. All of a sudden the Russian lunges forward, grabbing the American and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold. A sigh of disappointment goes up from the crowd, and the trainer buries his face in his hands for he knows all is lost. He can't watch the ending.
Suddenly there's a scream, a cheer from the crowd, and the trainer raises his eye just in time to see the Russian flying up in the air. The Russian's back more...

I personally have never taken seriously a college dropout who wandered
america in search of a job until he became the prophet of the angry right.
But anyway, I was thinking. ( a dangerous activity)
What is the difference between Rush Limbaugh and a TV Wrestler?
Consider:
TV Wrestler Rush
Male As far as we know.
White (usually) As far as we know.
Fat Definitely
Wears tight suits Yep.
Roars to adoring crowds. UnHuh.
Sponsored by obscure Sponsored by chain of
companies. Tall and Fat Stores.
Always on TV. yep.
Usually on Obscure yep.
Stations.
Appeals to bizarre Probably.
audience segment.
Doesn't seem to accom-
plish much but make money. yep.
Engages in low brow stunts. Yep.
Entertains more then informs. yep.
Well, I guess if he wants to the WWF always has room for him.
Maybe he could become a conservative TV Wrestler. "Loud Man."
he would wear a black and white suit and shout at all more...

Three men, an Scot, an English man and a sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building.
The Scot jumped off and shouted ”God save Scotland! ”
The English man jumped off and shouted ”God Save England! ”
The Sumo wrestler jumped off and shouted ”God save the person who I land on! ”

The world's most incredibly lazy man found a magic lamp. He rubbed it and a genie appeared and granted him three wishes. He wished for a horse, a sumo wrestler and a squirrel. "They're yours, but what are they for?" the genie asked. "I'm tired of walking everywhere--I want to just ride the horse. The sumo wrestler is so that I won't have to work to get on the horse." "But the squirrel?" asked the genie. "I need something to go' click-click' to start the horse!!!"

The worlds most incredibly lazy man found a magic lamp. He rubbed it and a genie appeared and granted him three wishes. He wished for a horse, a sumo wrestler and a squirrel. "Theyre yours, but what are they for?" the genie asked."Im tired of walking everywhere--I want to just ride the horse. The sumo wrestler is so that I wont have to work to get on the horse.""But the squirrel?" asked the genie."I need something to go click-click to start the horse!!!"