Younger Jokes / Recent Jokes
Three nun's were touring the local zoo one sunny afternoon having a picnic. While wandering around, they entered the monkey house.
Unfortunately, one of the nuns got to close to the gorilla cage and he pulled her inside. He savagely beat and raped the nun. It took 4 guards to pull the nun to safety. The nun spent three months in the hospital recovering and then was sent to a convent in England, for six months, to recover emotionally.
Amazingly, the same three nuns met up again the next year in the park. The younger of the two asked her if she minded talking about the experience in the zoo.
She said, "Of course not".
The younger nun asked "Did it hurt?"
The sister replied "Of course! He never called and he never wrote."
Three nun's were touring the local zoo one sunny afternoon having a picnic. While wandering around, they entered the monkey house.Unfortunately, one of the nuns got to close to the gorilla cage and he pulled her inside. He savagely beat and raped the nun. It took 4 guards to pull the nun to safety. The nun spent three months in the hospital recovering and then was sent to a convent in England, for six months, to recover emotionally.Amazingly, the same three nuns met up again the next year in the park. The younger of the two asked her if she minded talking about the experience in the zoo.She said, "Of course not".The younger nun asked "Did it hurt?"The sister replied "Of course! He never called and he never wrote."
Senior citizens are constantly being criticized for every conceivable deficiency of the modern world, real or imaginary. We know we take responsibility for all we have done and do not blame others. BUT, upon reflection, we would like to point out that it was NOT the senior citizens who took:
The melody out of music,
The pride out of appearance,
The romance out of love,
The commitment out of marriage,
The responsibility out of parenthood,
The togetherness out of the family,
The learning out of education,
The service out of patriotism,
The religion out of school,
The Golden Rule from rulers,
The nativity scene out of cities,
The civility out of behavior,
The refinement out of language,
The dedication out of employment,
The prudence out of spending, or
The ambition out of achievement.
And we certainly are NOT the ones who eliminated patience and tolerance from personal relationships and interactions with more...
Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter.
Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger coworker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one.
As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong.
Gasping for breath, she replied, "When I see two men from the gas company running as hard as you two were, I figured I'd better run too!"
It seems that a young couple had just gotten married and spent their wedding night with the young man's parents.
In the morning the mother got up and prepared a lovely breakfast, went to the bottom of the stairs and called for them to come down for breakfast. After a long wait the family ate without the newlyweds. The mother said, "I wonder why they never came down to eat?"
The grooms young brother said, "Mommy, I think -- "
"Oh shut up, I don't want to hear what you think!" said the mother, not wanting to hear any inappropriate comments from the younger brother.
At lunch time the mother again prepared a wonderful meal and again called the young couple to eat. After another long wait the family proceeded to eat, and after the meal was completed the mother once again said, "I wonder why they never came down to eat?" Once again the younger brother started to speak, but was interrupted by the more...
Old Enough To Start Cussing
Two brothers were getting dressed for school. The older one says,"I think I'm
old enough to start cussing."
Younger one, "Me too. Whatcha gonna say?"
Older boy,"Dad says' damn' a lot, so that's what I'll say."
Younger boy, "I'm gonna say' betchyer ass', Dad says that all the time.
They go down for breakfast, sit at the table. Mom comes in, says to the older
one,"What would you like for breakfast dear?"
He replies, "Gimme a damn bowl of Fruit Loops."
Mom knocks older son off his chair, turns to younger one,"And what would YOU
like for breakfast?"
Younger son, "Betcher ass I don't want Fruit Loops!"
Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighborhood. They parked their truck the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house a woman looking out her kitchen window watched the two men as they checked her gas meter.Finishing the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger coworker to a foot race down the alley back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one.As they came running up to the truck, they realized the lady from that last house was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped and asked her what was wrong.Gasping for breath, she replied, "When I see two gas men running as hard as you two were, I figured I'd better run too!"