"10 signs you've joined a cheap H.M.O." joke

Your annual breast exam is conducted at Hooter's.
Directions to your doctor's office include, "Take a left when you enter the trailer park."
The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.
The only proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter.
The only item listed under Preventive Care coverage is "an apple a day."
Your "primary care physician" is wearing the pants you gave to Goodwill last month.
"The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges" is not a typo.
The only expense covered 100% is embalming.
With your last HMO, your Prozac didn't come in different colors with little "M&M"s on them.
You ask for Viagra; you get a Popsicle stick and duct tape.

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