"A Kitty's Christmas" joke
'Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the house
Not a creature was stirring,
Not even a mouse.
'Cuzz the cat had pounced on him
And tore him apart -
Ate his mouse intestines
And chewed up his heart.
Kitty thought he heard sleighbells,
Which made him take pause -
He stopped daintily licking
The blood from his claws.
"Must be Santa," thought Kitty
(That quite clever cat)
'Cuz nobody else climbs down
The chimney like that.
Indeed it was ol' Santa
So jolly and fat
With a huge load of presents
And all for the cat!
"Wow, the best Christmas ever!"
Kitty thought with a purr,
Then he coughed up a hairball
And shed some more fur.
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