"A Lorry driver feeling tired after..." joke

A Lorry driver feeling tired after driving for days decides to stop by at a b and b. The woman who owns it says "im sorry, were full, u can bunk up if ya want" The man being so desperate agrees."But i warn u, the guy your sharing with is a heavy snorer"
Morning after.
"The guy didnt disturb u did he?"
"No" replys the guy.
" Before i went to sleep i stripped naked and gave him a big snog on the lips. so he stayed awake all night watching me with a gun!"

A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit more...

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your momas so fat when she steped on a scale the scale said o shit i want ur weight not ur fone number

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A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good more...

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A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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