"Advice Column on Pregnancy" joke

Q. Am I more likely to get pregnant if my husband wears boxers rather than briefs?

A. Yes, but you'll have an even better chance if he doesn't wear anything at all.

Q. What is the easiest way to figure out exactly when I got pregnant?

A. Have sex once a year.

Q. What is the most common pregnancy craving?

A. For men to be the ones who get pregnant.

Q. My blood type is O-positive and my husband's is A-negative. What if my baby is born type AB-positive?

A. Then the jig is up.

Q. I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?

A. With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q. How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?

A. If it's the flu, you'll get better.

Q. Since I became pregnant, My breasts, rear end, and even my feet have grown. Is there anything that gets smaller during pregnancy?

A. Yes, your bladder.

Q. Under what circumstances can sex at the end of pregnancy bring on labor?

A. When the sex is between your husband and another woman.