"An accountant is having a hard time" joke

An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and so he decides to go to see his doctor. "Doctor, I just can't get to sleep at night," complains the man."Have you tried counting sheep?" inquired the doctor. The accountant replied, "That's the problem, Doc. I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it!"

A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $10.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive more...

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Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit more...

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A woman's breasts are like a child's toys. They are meant for the child - but the husband is the one that usually ends up playing with them.

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Q: What's the worst trick you can do to your blind brother?
A: Leave the plunger in the toilet

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