"Anti-Chain Letter" joke

This is not a chain letter. It was not started decades ago in the
Netherlands, nor was it perpetrated centuries ago by some deranged monk on
Easter Island (which is highly unlikely in the first place, since EMACS
only works on smart display terminals, and they weren't available on Easter
Island back then, due largely to the U.S. state department's vigorous ban on
exportation of advanced technology to deranged monks on equatorial islands).
There is no luck associated with this letter. Hence, it is
pointless to send five copies of this letter to people you like. In fact,
it is vigorously discouraged, since, by sending this letter through the
postal service, you are needlessly burdening an already overworked system.
You also increase the chance of the postal service losing mail. Murphy's
Law will take effect here, resulting in your letter being delivered the next
day, and a Red Cross package to a needy individual in Zimbabwe to be
accidentally re-routed to Hackensack, New Jersey, thus becoming lost
forever. You do not stand a chance, however, of displacing any junk mail.
If you break the chain, and fail to send five copies of this letter
to other unfortunate individuals, then absolutely nothing extraordinary will
happen to you. If, on the other hand, you do propagate five copies of this
letter, then absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen to you, either.
Leo L. Schwab