"Cured of Kleptomania" joke
"I have good news for you, Mrs. Burton," the psychiatrist said. "It's been eighteen months since you began therapy, there have been no incidents in all that time, so I'm confident in pronouncing you cured of your kleptomania.
"That is wonderful news, doctor, but can we be absolutely sure?" asked the patient.
"I believe so," replied the doctor, "but if you have any doubts, why don't you stop at Sears on the way home and just walk through the store. I don't think you'll feel any temptation at all to shoplift."
"Thank you so much, doctor," said the patient. "How can I ever thank you for all you've done to help me?"
"Well," said the doctor, "if you do happen to have a relapse, my daughter would love a new television for her bedroom."
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