"Differences Between You and Your Boss" joke

When you take a long time, you're slow.
When your boss takes a long time, he's being thorough.
When you don't do it, you're lazy.
When your boss doesn't do it, he's too busy.
When you make an error, you're an idiot.
When your boss makes an error, he's only human.
When you do something without being told, you're overstepping your authority.
When your boss does the same thing, that's initiative.
When you take a stand, you're being bull-headed.
When your boss takes a stand, he's being firm.
When you overlook a rule of etiquette, you're being rude.
When your boss skips a few rules, he's being original.
When you please your boss, you're apple polishing.
When your boss pleases his boss, he's being cooperative.
When you're out of the office, you're wandering around.
When your boss is out of the office, he's on business.
When you're off on a sick day, you're always sick.
When your boss is off on a sick day, he must be very ill.
When you apply for a leave, you must be going on an interview.
When your boss applies for a leave, it's because he's overworked.