"Doing It All Wrong" joke

Disgusted with his life, an absent-minded professor decided to commit suicide. That night his wife returned home to find him hanging from the ceiling by his ankles.

"What are you doing up there?" she asked.

"I'm trying to kill myself," replied the professor.

"You're doing it all wrong," said his wife. "You're supposed to put the rope around your neck."

"I tried it that way," whined the professor, "but I couldn't breathe."

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